


momentous

by madkingray



Series: we're still here [2]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Zombie Apocalypse, C-Section, Cesarean Section, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Trans Keith (Voltron), Unplanned Pregnancy, child birth, mentions of amputation, mild depictions of violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-04
Updated: 2017-12-14
Packaged: 2018-11-23 05:27:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 25,244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11396256
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/madkingray/pseuds/madkingray
Summary: Right now the fear outweighs any other emotion because it’s not a scare this time, it’s real. When he rests a hand across his stomach a new one starts to blossom, starting in his chest and slowly spreading everywhere else until he finds himself smiling.He feelshappy.-trans keith + unplanned pregnancy + zomb au





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [transyaois](https://archiveofourown.org/users/transyaois/gifts).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is a gift for my friend because it's their birthday! so! happy birthday! this fic is based on an au we've discussed that is inspired by the walking dead. specifically, season 3 episode 4 :). this universe is also a part of a zomb au i have in the works, but that comes out in the future. so, enjoy <3! 
> 
> (also, thank you so much to my betas who went over this several times to make sure it was okay! i love you ;_; thank you x one thousand honestly <3)
> 
> i'm honestly not sure what i should warn for so i'll just say what might need to be said here!
> 
>  **WARNINGS:** unplanned pregnancy, child birth, c-section, mentions of amputation, mild depictions of violence

**momentous**  
_adjective_ | mo·men·tous | \mō-ˈmen-təs, mə-\  
important, consequential • a _momentous_ decision

 

Keith had only gotten the test on a whim after feeling a bit _off_ for some time, expecting a negative result. It was easy to assume that it wouldn’t be possible since it wasn’t before all of this but as he stares at the two pink lines he realizes that it definitely is.

“Pregnant,” he repeats faintly. “I’m pregnant.”

They had a pregnancy scare a few months back, caused by a faulty test they later discovered, and the relief he felt at the time nearly overwhelmed him. It wasn’t just relief he felt, though; Keith also had a flash of disappointment because there was a part of him, deep down inside, that still craved a family of his own.

Right now the fear outweighs any other emotion because it’s not a scare this time, it’s _real._ When he rests a hand across his stomach a new one starts to blossom, starting in his chest and slowly spreading everywhere else until he finds himself smiling.

He feels _happy._

A knock on the door startles him and he only relaxes when he remembers that he locked it. “Keith?” Shiro’s voice is laced with concern, and a softness that’s only reserved for him. “Are you all right? You’ve been in there for a while.”

“I’m fine,” he answers, somehow managing to keep his voice steady. “Got lost in thought, I’ll be out in a sec.”

There’s a pause and Keith prays that Shiro believes him because he doesn’t want to have to explain just yet what is going on with him, not yet. “Okay,” Shiro finally says and Keith slumps against the wall, thankful that he did. “You better hurry before all the rolls are gone.”

“You’ll save some for me anyways,” he replies, smiling when Shiro laughs. He clings to the sound of it even as it fades away, closing his eyes and imagining Shiro right beside him to calm his nerves.

He could go out there and ask Shiro for comfort, sit down on his lap and welcome his embrace, but he’s still wrapping his head around the new situation he’s in. While he is happy about the fact that he’s going to have a baby, there’s a huge chance that Shiro might not feel the same.

Keith wraps the tests in toilet paper, placing them at the bottom of his bag before getting up to wash his hands. He splashes water on his face, staring at his reflection as he dries it with a small towel and wonders if there are any differences he can spot.

Nope, he still looks the same.

“Bring it up to him,” he tells himself, distressed eyes looking back at him. “You have to.”

He doesn’t.

☆ ☆ ☆

It’s brought up a few nights later, when Keith is still breathless and twitching while Shiro is kissing his neck. He laughs when he feels Shiro’s light scruff against his skin, pushing him away. “I thought I told you to shave.”

“You like it.”

Shiro moves so that he’s lying next to him and Keith waits until he’s on his back before shifting closer, resting his head on Shiro’s chest. Fingers run through his hair, the action soothing and causing him to slowly doze off. He doesn’t even open his eyes when Shiro sighs in the way that tells him that he’s got something on his mind, humming to show that he’ll be listening.

“What’s been going on with you?”

“Nothing,” he mumbles, pushing his head up into the touch. “I’m okay.”

“Are you sure?”

Keith says nothing, opening his eyes and staring at the wall. “No,” he finally admits after a long moment of silence. “I’m so lost right now and I don’t know what to do.” Taking a deep breath, he continues before Shiro can speak. “I think I’ve already made the choice but is it really the right one? Could I really do it, especially with how the world is right now? They don’t deserve that, Shiro, and I don’t even know if I’ll be a good…” Keith bites the inside of his cheek to prevent more from spilling out, the hand in his hair stilling.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, can you please explain?”

He sits up, staring down at Shiro’s face. Shiro wears the look of worry he’s been carrying, only seen when Keith catches him looking. “I’m pregnant.” Keith whispers as he looks away, not wanting to see his expression change.

Arms wrap around him and he sinks into the embrace, pressing his face into Shiro’s shoulder and clinging to him. “You said you made your choice, right?” Shiro asks with no indication in his voice as to what he could be feeling.

“I want to keep it.” Keith answers in a small voice. “But it’s not a good idea.”

“Why not?”

“Look at the world around us,” he says, pulling back and gesturing out the window. “Do you think our child deserves to live in a world like this? Do you think they’ll grow up happy here? Safe? Will they make it to an old age and die peacefully in their sleep or will they be torn apart by infected?” Keith covers his stomach, staring down at it and hating the way his eyes well up. “I think of all of this but you know what else I think of? Our child having your eyes…my hair…”

“So you don’t want to…”

“No, I don’t.” Keith voice drops to a whisper. “I’m scared, Takashi.”

One of Shiro’s hands covers his own, curling gently around his fingers. “I am too,” Shiro says, just as quiet, and when he looks up at him he sees a hint of a smile on his face. “Tell me, really tell me: do _you_ want this?”

There’s no hesitation. “Yes.”

“So do I.”

Keith meets him for a kiss, other hand cupping Shiro’s cheek and smiling at the rough feel. He’s tugged into Shiro’s lap and only pulls away to catch his breath, smile turning into a smirk at Shiro’s noise when he rolls his hips. “Again?”

“Don’t sound so surprised,” Shiro mutters, wrapping an arm around him as he presses his lips to Keith’s chest. Keith jolts when he feels teeth against skin, playfully tugging at Shiro’s hair. “You good?”

He replies with another kiss which muffles his gasp when Shiro rocks up. “Yeah,” he murmurs, licking his lips. “Definitely.”

☆ ☆ ☆

They decide to keep it to themselves for now, unsure of what could happen in the next few weeks. Keith doesn’t mind, happy to share this feeling with Shiro and Shiro only. There has been more conversations about it, the two of them figuring out what they’ll need in the future and when Shiro should start looking.

(“No more supply runs for me,” Keith tells him one afternoon, head pillowed on Shiro’s lap while they’re relaxing on the couch. “I won’t even step outside the gates.”

“How come?” Shiro questions with a bewildered expression, which makes sense because Keith isn’t known to back down and stay behind even when he’s told to do so.

This is different

“We both know I can handle myself out there but I still don’t want to risk them.” he answers quietly, fingers brushing over his still flat stomach. “They’re not even here yet and I already want to do everything I can to keep them safe, that’s the best I can do right now.” He pauses. “Is that weird?”

Shiro’s confusion clears, face growing softer as he rests his hand over his stomach. “It doesn’t seem weird to me, Keith. That might be because I feel something similar so you won’t hear me complaining about this choice you’ve made.”

“You’d say the same thing if I decided to do this outside of pregnancy.”

“I won’t confirm or deny that.”)

It also brings a new closeness to them, Shiro constantly touching him and even keeping his palm on his stomach throughout the nights. Keith will usually cover that hand with his own, not telling Shiro that he actually finds it adorable.

Keith isn’t able to estimate how far along he really is since the size of his belly doesn’t tell him a thing. He knows that he’s supposed to get bigger as time passes but there’s barely been any change to his stomach. Is that normal? Will he ever get a bump? What if that’s a bad sign?

He doesn’t voice these worries to Shiro because he knows that the suggestion will be to go to Pidge’s mother, who was a nurse before all of this and uses her skills to make sure everyone is well bandaged and healthy in their small community. Keith isn’t quite ready to go see her, not wanting to share the news that he’s with child, but the decision is pretty much out of his hands after a while.

Morning sickness hits and it hits _hard._

“You should go see Colleen about it,” Shiro says one afternoon as he holds Keith’s hair back, even reaching past him to flush the toilet himself when Keith clumsily attempts to do so. “I don’t think it’s normal for you to get sick every time you eat.”

“Shut up, Takashi.” Keith mutters, pushing himself up to stand.

He allows Shiro to help him over to the sink and turns the knob, cupping his hands beneath the running water and rinsing his mouth a couple of times before grabbing his toothbrush. They have toothpaste this month, something he’s grateful for as he brushes his teeth until the taste of vomit is gone.

He slows down when he sees the bag under his eyes in his own reflection, the way he looks a bit sickly, and sighs. Shiro is right, of course, and after he rinses his mouth again he nods. “I’ll go later today, that way you can pick me up when you’re finished with your job.”

“I’m just guarding the wall, I can ask someone else to take over for me so I can go with you.”

“You’ve already done that too many times, Lance is going to start complaining.” Keith tugs on Shiro’s arm and they slowly walk into their bedroom, heading over to the bed which became a huge comfort after spending his morning kneeling on the bathroom floor. “He’s already annoyed that I haven’t been doing my own jobs, don’t let him feel the same way over you.”

“I can handle him,” Shiro murmurs in response but does pull away to get ready. Keith watches him as he does so, eyeing his back and licking his lips when he feels a spark of _heat_ in his gut. He doesn’t say anything about that when Shiro returns to his side.

“Should I tell her?” Keith asks quietly when Shiro leans down, placing a hand on his chest to stop him from doing anything.

Shiro only smiles at him, removing his hand and then kissing his forehead. “It’s your decision,” he says before kissing him on the lips. “You might have to anyways so we can figure out how to make you feel better.”

He gives a nod and grips Shiro’s shirt as he’s about to step back, keeping his face tilted up. “One more kiss?”

“If I give one more you’ll ask for another and then an extra, I won’t ever leave.” Shiro still kisses him, this one longer.

“What’s so wrong with that?” Keith counters but lets him go, falling back on the bed. “See you later.”

☆ ☆ ☆

He leaves two hours after Shiro does, heading over to Pidge’s house and feeling nervous as he knocks on the door.

Thankfully, her mother is the one who opens it—surprised to see him there. “Are you looking for Pidge?” she asks in a curious voice. “Or Matt? They’re not here right now; they went off to try and fix more of the lights.”

Keith shakes his head. “I’m here to see you, actually.” He bites his lip, honestly feeling nervous. “I’ve been feeling sick and I wanted to know if there’s anything you have that can make me feel better.”

She stares at him and Keith can feel himself fidget in place at the intensity of it. “Let’s go to my office, then,” she says after a few seconds, shutting the door when she steps outside with him. “I have everything I need there.”

“You have an office?”

“I didn’t want any more blood on my carpet.”

Her office turns out to be another house, all of the furniture cleared out from the living room and replaced with a shelf containing different kinds of medical equipment and three cots. He sits down on the one she points at and watches her comb through her shelf, blinking at the many items she comes back with.

“What are your symptoms?” she asks as she pulls on a pair of latex gloves. He opens his mouth when she holds one of those larger popsicle sticks, allowing her to check his throat. “It looks a bit swollen…”

“I’ve been throwing up a lot,” he answers when she pulls away. “I think I feel a bit warmer than usual? And I’ve been feeling really tired even though I sleep a ton.”

Colleen hums and picks up the thermometer next. “Do you know _why_ you’ve been sick?” she asks while placing it beneath his tongue. When he gives a shake of his head, she raises an eyebrow. “Keith, I need to know so we can figure out if you need medicine or not.”

“Maybe I’m coming down with the flu?” Keith offers once the thermometer is out of his mouth, reading the temperature (ninety-eight degrees) and huffing when she simply gives him a _look_ like she knows it’s not the truth. “Okay, fine. I know why.”

She crosses her arms, waiting.

Keith looks away. “I’m pregnant.”

“I thought so.”

His gaze snaps back to her, unable to keep the shock out of his voice. “How!?”

“I remember being pregnant once or twice,” she answers with a small wave of her hand, pulling her chair closer to herself and sitting across from him. “You’re keeping it, right? If you weren’t, then you probably wouldn’t even be here right now.” Her eyes hold no judgement, only the warmth they always hold whenever she speaks to him.

“Yes,” he interlocks his fingers, tapping his thumbs together. “I want to.”

Colleen smiles at him and he reads excitement on her face. “Shiro knows, right?” she asks and continues when Keith nods in response. “Good. Okay. Have you been gaining any weight?”

“I’m not sure, we don’t have a scale.” Keith frowns. “I’m supposed to have a baby bump, right? Is it normal to not have one?”

“It is,” she answers and he feels himself sag in relief. “People usually start showing later in their pregnancy if it’s their first one so you’ll get one down the line, as long as you keep eating right.” A pause. “Have you been able to keep your food down?”

“No, I throw up after every meal.” Keith frowns. “Shiro thinks it isn’t normal for me to do that, which is why I’m here today. Also because I’m tired of vomiting constantly, and I want something to help me with it.”

“There’s no medicine to help you with this,” Colleen opens up one of her cabinets. “You could try drinking a bit of tea to help soothe your stomach, but having a lot is bad for you and the baby. Bed rest is the best option, along with some of this.”

She holds out a bottle of Gatorade and when Keith drinks some, opening it at her pointed nod, he feels a bit better. While it might just be his imagination helping him along, he’s certainly not complaining over something quelling the nausea he feels all the time.

“Thank you,” Keith says quietly once he’s downed half of it.

“I’ll tell Hunk to bring back a case when he goes on another supply run.” Colleen places three more beside him, a kind smile on her face. “I won’t tell him that it’s for you, so don’t look so worried.”

“I’m not worried,” he mutters, feeling his lips twitch when she laughs. “Is there anything else I’ll need?”

“Vitamins, of course, though I don’t know when you’ll be able to get them. If I give a list to anyone who goes out there, they’ll be able to recognize the items on it, especially if it’s Pidge, Hunk, or Matt with the other.”

“Shiro can get them.”

“He won’t leave you alone, I know how it is.”

“If I tell him it’s something I need, then he’ll go out there,” Keith doesn’t doubt for a second that Shiro would head on out to find the vitamins for him and some extra so the rest of Keith’s pregnancy goes well. “Do you think I’ll be able to do it?”

“You can. I won’t lie to you and say that it’ll be easy, because it might not be. Our lack of resources will make it harder, especially when you go through labor, so we’ll have to plan ahead.”

He hadn’t even thought of that. “Oh.”

She rubs his shoulder and he actually finds it comforting. “Don’t worry about it right now, we can discuss it when you’re farther along instead.”

There’s a knock on the door and Colleen walks over to open it. The sight of Shiro looking out of breath makes Keith sit up straighter. “You didn’t have to rush for me, I would have been fine here.” Keith points out, welcoming the kiss he receives as a greeting.

“I know,” Shiro slips a hand beneath his shirt, thumb stroking over his hip. “You good?”

“I will be.”

☆ ☆ ☆

When he finally starts to show, it’s a tiny bump—unnoticeable to their friends but definitely to both of them. Shiro becomes a bit unbearable, constantly asking if he’s okay, taking up all the strenuous work, and more. It makes him wonder if Colleen told him anything after their meeting because he has no other explanation for this kind of behavior.

There’s only one thing that fills him with anger mixed with annoyance.

“Stop giving me your food!” Keith hisses, sliding the plate back to him.

“You need it more than I do,” Shiro replies as he places it back in front of him, grabbing one of the apples from the basket and taking a bite from it. “I don’t need to eat a lot to get through the day, I’ll be fine.”

“At this point _you_ are the one who needs it, you’ve been doing this for the past few days!”

Shiro says nothing else, gazing at him as he continues to eat his apple.

Feeling vexed—a familiar emotion after however many times Shiro has pulled this with him—he crosses his arms and looks away. A tense silence falls between them, something that doesn’t go unnoticed by their friends.

Lance, of course, is the first to comment. “Jeez, what’s up with you two? Actually, I don’t want to know. All I want is for you to _not_ argue at the dinner table, we’re trying to eat here!”

“We’re not arguing,” Shiro replies and Keith feels himself scowl. “We just had a small disagreement.”

“Disagreement my ass,” he mutters under his breath. He glares at Shiro’s plate, arms crossed and mouth twisted. There’s an uneasy air afterwards and he knows he’s getting more than a few looks from his friends but he doesn’t care, irritation building up inside him and clawing at his insides like it _needs_ to be released.

The conversations around him go through one ear and out the other, muffled only to him as he focuses on relaxing.

He remembers when one of the women in his neighborhood got pregnant and how his mother told her time and time again to take it easy, because any stress or negative emotions was apparently bad for the baby. Maybe this counts, too.

Keith pushes himself up carefully, looking over at Shiro first and then Allura. “I’m going for a walk,” he informs them, stepping away from his chair and waving in their direction before doing exactly that.

No one follows after him, thankfully, so he keeps his pace slow. Keith doesn’t have a destination in mind and simply continues to walk until he finds a place to stop at, looking all around him as he moves along.

He ends up at the library.

It’s a small building, obviously meant to give the people who lived in this town something to do. He props one of the doors open with a brick, heading further inside. Keith pays no attention to the books, though his fingers glide along the spines as he walks through the aisles. He eventually comes across a small reading area, books in a neat stack on top of the small table with bean bags surrounding it.

Keith sits down on the red bean bag and is happy to discover that it’s really comfy.

Reaching out towards the table, he picks up the book on the very top and starts flipping through it. He stops at a random page and starts to read, only stopping when he reads the same passage about five times and sets it aside.

“Keith?”

He considers not answering, sinking down further into the bean bag. After a few more calls of his name he sighs, turning his head towards the sound of Shiro’s voice.

“Over here.”

Shiro’s tense posture is the first thing that he notices, watching as it drains away when he turns his head towards Keith. They stare at each other for longer than necessary until Keith pats the space beside him.

While Shiro does move closer, he seems to hesitate before he’s within reach. “Can you sit on my lap instead?” Shiro asks softly and honestly fidgets in place when Keith raises an eyebrow. “I want to hold you, Keith.”

“Only if you sit on this one,” Keith counters and stands up, waiting for Shiro to sit down before carefully sitting on his lap. He shifts until he’s comfortable and ends up with his head rested on Shiro’s shoulder as fingers run through his hair.

“I’ve been bugging you, haven’t I?”

Keith shifts so that his ear is directly over Shiro’s heart, the sound of it causing him to relax even further. “Yes,” he answers truthfully, letting out a sigh and closing his eyes. “I know you mean well, Shiro, but giving up your own portion doesn’t make me feel good.”

“You need to eat more, Keith. You’re—”

“I know, I _know._ I’m eating for two. It just bothers me that I’m taking food from you when I can get seconds on my own.” He sits up so he can look at Shiro, unable to keep the frown off his face. “You need to eat as well, especially if you keep going out there for runs.”

Shiro simply gazes at him, the affection in his eyes never leaving. “How about this,” he begins and reaches up with a hand. It rests against his cheek and Keith leans into it with a hum, enjoying the way his thumb rubs over his cheekbone. “I give you some of mine if you can’t get more.”

He sighs. “Shiro…”

“We don’t know how our food situation will be in a couple of months and we especially don’t know how our crops will do.” Shiro gains a furrow to his brow like this is something he’s been worried about for a while, which only clears when Keith leans forward to kiss the spot. “Sacrificing some food so you and our baby have enough to eat is worth it, Keith.”

The hand on his cheek starts to slide down until it reaches the hem of his shirt. Keith nods when he sees Shiro’s questioning look and feels his lips twitch at the look of adoration Shiro gets when his hand rests against his stomach.

His shirt is pushed up even further and Shiro leans forward. Keith shivers at the feel of lips against his skin, reaching up and lightly tugging on his tuft of hair.

“Only if we run low,” he finally agrees after thinking about it for longer, pushing Shiro back against the bean bag and sitting on his lap again. “And only then, Shiro. Don’t try to sneak more onto my plate when you think I’m not looking.”

“So you _did_ catch that.”

“No but thanks for admitting that you have.” He pauses. “We’re taking this bean bag home.”

☆ ☆ ☆

He can’t hide this secret for long.

It comes out when he’s confronted about his lack of work within their small community, Lance scowling fiercely at him with his arms crossed as he stares at him. “Well?” he asks impatiently, obviously wanting an answer. “You got an explanation for not working as much as we do?”

Keith sighs.

“Lance, just calm down,” Shiro says beside him and Keith rolls his eyes when he sees the glare turn onto Shiro next. “You don’t have to be angry about this. There is a very important reason as to why Keith isn’t allowed to do so much heavy lifting.”

“He doesn’t even go out on supply runs, Shiro!” Lance cries out while throwing his arms out. “Something that he _loves_ to do! So please, Keith, tell me why you’re not doing your _job_ anymore!”

Embarrassment washes over him when he sees Hunk and Allura looking down from their small watch tower, Pidge and Matt stopping in place down the sidewalk, and Coran close by but head turned in their direction.

He catches Shiro’s nod from the corner of his eye, obviously a way to tell Keith that he’ll be okay with whatever decision he makes right now. The support gives him the courage he needs to look Lance in the eye, hands clenched into fists by his side and voice unwavering when he speaks.

“I’m pregnant.”

The reaction is immediate, Lance’s eyes going wide and mouth dropping open. He said it low enough so he’s the only one who heard but, knowing Lance, everyone else will soon hear in a bit so he continues with his explanation.

“I don’t know how far along I am, but I haven’t been going on supply runs because I didn’t want to risk the baby in _any_ way, and I’ve been limiting my work load because Shiro doesn’t want me to strain myself. I’m _sorry_ if it seems like I’ve been lazy or whatever but it’s really just me wanting to make sure this goes well.”

It’s utterly silent for several long moments.

A hand touches his right one, gently unfurling it so their fingers can interlock. When he sneaks a peek at Shiro he catches sight of the small, proud smile on his face. They say nothing to each other, Keith looking back at Lance while a kiss is pressed to the side of his head.

Lance seems to come back to himself, mouth closing with an audible _click_ before he starts pointing at Keith. “You’re what!?”

“Pregnant.”

He points to Keith’s stomach next. “Baby!?”

“Yes.”

Then, at Shiro. “Him!?”

“Who else?”

When it seems like Lance has more to say Keith reaches out to grab his finger, giving it a shake before letting go. “As we have established now: I am pregnant with a baby because of Shiro.” He raises his voice. “And now everyone knows and can come talk about it since they’re just waiting for the chance to do so.”

They’re surrounded in an instant.

Keith does take a step back when they all start talking at once, leaning into Shiro’s embrace when he wraps an arm around him. He knows they mean well and they’re just curious but it’s honestly starting to feel overwhelming, something that Shiro must sense.

“Alright, alright! Calm down!” Shiro barks and everyone falls silent. Keith pats his hand in silent gratitude. “Let’s do this one by one, okay? Keith can be the one to decide who will go.”

This time he gives his hand a squeeze and then steps away from him, looking at all their friends before pointing at an excitable Allura.

“Are you going to have godparents for them?” Her words express the enthusiasm well, especially when she bounces in place. “Oh, wait, nevermind about that! Do you need us to start getting baby items for you on supply runs?”

“That’d be nice, Allura.” He tells her with a smile. “You can even take Shiro with you when you go. I think he’ll be a great judge for things like cribs or strollers.” Keith knows this to be true because Shiro will make sure every inch of those sort of things will be perfectly safe for their child. “Not all at once, though. We don’t know what can happen.”

She nods, understanding his meaning.

Pidge waves her hand around and Keith almost laughs. “This isn’t school, Pidge, but go right ahead.”

“What about powdered milk?” she questions immediately. “I think that’s something we should stock up on right away—diapers and wipes as well! Those are the things you’ll need the most so we shouldn’t wait until we have to go farther and farther out for these things.”

“Maybe we shouldn’t take the stuff that’s nearby?” Matt is looking at Pidge with a contemplating expression. “So that way, in case of an emergency, it’s only a long walk or a quick drive.”

“That’s actually a good plan,” says Shiro with his own thoughtful look. “We should hide them in a safe spot at least, that way no one else messes it up if they’re passing through.”

“Are you going to want a baby shower?” Lance seems to have gotten over his shock and is now pointing at Keith (again), eyes narrowed. “You do, right? I can start planning for it.”

Keith blinks and thinks it over. “A small party,” he counters. “Nothing too extravagant, we don’t need to waste all our supplies on something like that.”

“We can have a small dinner and give you gifts?”

“That works.”

Lance beams at him, and it’s so strange to see that directed at him, before nodding towards Shiro, “I’m happy for both of you, really. Starting a family is a pretty big deal and, despite the whole undead situation, I’m glad it’s happening.” His grin gets wider. “We’ll all be one big family!”

He feels himself smile in response to that, ducking his head to hide it. “Guess you’re right about that,” he says quietly. Then, he peeks up through his bangs just so he can watch Lance’s reaction. “Does that mean you’ll be their uncle?”

There’s a pause where the question seems to slowly sink in, and then that wide smile is back. “Holy crap! I’ll be an uncle again!” Keith is surprised when he’s pulled into a hug, hearing Lance laugh in his ear as he pats his back. “Thanks!”

After he’s let go and Lance is off bouncing by Hunk’s side, he feels a tug on his arm and glances over at an uncharacteristically serious Coran. “What about the delivery?” he asks in a tone of worry. “I don’t know how we’ll get what we need for it but doing it natural is far too dangerous, you could die.” Coran looks down at his stomach. “You both could.”

That possibility hadn’t really entered his mind and now Keith feels sick at the thought, resting his hand on the area and swallowing. “We’ll talk more when I start to get bigger,” he finally says after staying silent for a bit. “Until then, _please_ don’t bring up these worries to Shiro. I don’t want him to stress over the thought of losing us.”

Although Coran frowns, he still nods in response. “You’ll have to discuss it with him, Keith,” he warns. “Maybe not now but definitely after you form a plan. What if something were to go wrong? All he can do is stand by and watch and that’s not the place he’ll want to be.”

Keith sighs. “I know, I know.”

After another nod, Coran’s expression shifts to a much more exuberant one, clasping Keith’s hands in his own and giving them a shake. “Congratulations, Keith! I’m so happy for you!” he lets go and does a twirl to reach Shiro’s side, giving him the same treatment. “And you too, Shiro! I’m sure the two of you are awfully excited!”

Shiro laughs loudly and Keith wants to bottle up the sound to carry around with him forever so he can always listen to it, basking in the happiness he radiates as he edges closer. “We are,” Shiro says and wraps an arm around Keith when he’s close enough. “I don’t think I’ve stopped smiling since I found out.”

Keith smiles to himself, closing his eyes and feeling so very content.

☆ ☆ ☆

“Honey? I’m home!”

“It’s still not going to stick,” Keith remarks dryly, but he does greet him at the door with a kiss. An arm wraps around his waist, keeping him there to draw it out until they both break apart. He peeks into the bag that Shiro is carrying, smiling more to himself than at Shiro. “You got me sunflower seeds!”

“Of course I did, you asked for them.”

Keith shuts the door when Shiro steps in further, taking the bag from him and leaving him there to take off his boots and jacket. He’s putting the canned food into the cupboards when Shiro embraces him from behind and slips a hand under his shirt, palm spread across his stomach, an action that only makes Keith fondly shake his head before continuing with his task.

“Wanna go for a walk?” Shiro mumbles against his hair once he’s done. “Just me and you.”

Turning so that he’s facing him, Keith offers a teasing smile. “Who else would I go with?” He brings him down for another kiss, placing one hand against his cheek and brushing over his stubble with his thumb. “Hmm.”

“No complaints?”

“I like it this time.” Keith leans forward and presses his forehead against Shiro’s shoulder. “In a bit? I missed you.”

“You’re actually admitting it this time? I’m shocked.”

“Nevermind, you can go for a walk by yourself.”

Shiro only laughs in response and continues to hold him. Keith says nothing more and simply enjoys his embrace, pulling away once he’s gotten his fill and nodding. “Okay, we can go now.”

The sun is starting to set when they step outside, the sky turning from light blue to orange with hints of magenta. There’s a breeze that tickles his skin and he shivers even though he’s wearing a jacket, linking his arm with Shiro’s and pressing against him like that’ll warm him up.

It actually helps.

Keith doesn’t see anyone around and figures that they’ve probably gone back to their own homes. It’s a nice night to be out, sure, but it’s also perfect enough to stay inside with the doors wide open to let the cool air freshen up the house.

Shiro brings them to a stop in front of the fountain in the center of the town and while there’s no water in it or sprouting from the top, it’s still a nice thing to gaze at as they sit down on the benches. The streetlamps around them suddenly flicker on and Keith frowns.

“Why’d they turn it on? It’ll be dark in a bit…”

“I asked them to.”

Keith looks over at him, confused. The feeling only gets stronger when he catches sight of the nervous look on his face, giving Shiro’s hand a squeeze to soothe him. Shiro smiles at him before taking a deep breath and standing up. He tugs on Keith’s hand, obviously indicating for him to follow which Keith does with a sigh.

He waits patiently.

“Keith,” Shiro starts, his voice strong in contrast to the way his body trembles just slightly. “I want to start off by saying that I love you and that you mean the world to me, I can’t imagine life without you at this point.”

“I feel the same.” Keith murmurs, taken aback by the brilliant smile he receives in response. It’s a gorgeous smile, like always, but it’s different this time—happy with a hint of _more._

Shiro stares at him for longer before ducking his head, sticking his free hand into the pocket of his jacket and coming out with it curled into a fist. “I’m saying all this because I wanted to ask you something,” he laughs; the breathy, delighted one that Keith loves. “I actually had more things to say but one look at your gorgeous face made me forget all that.”

He swats his arm lightly.

“Okay, okay.”

Here, Shiro raises Keith’s hand and places his fist into it. Slowly, the fingers uncurl and then the hand is pulled away, leaving behind a small, circular shaped object. Keith doesn’t have to look down to know what it is and keeps his gaze on Shiro, who doesn’t look away either.

“Will you—”

Keith cuts him off before he can finish the question, smile spreading across his face. “Yes, Takashi.”

Now he can name the emotion when Shiro’s smile returns: _elation,_ because it’s an emotion he’s currently feeling as well.

“We can’t really have a ceremony, I know, but I still wanted to do this. You’re the one I want to be with, for the rest of my life, and I promise to stay by your side and keep you safe,” he places a hand on Keith’s stomach. “Both of you.”

Shiro then takes it from his hand and slips it onto his ring finger, their smiles never leaving.

A perfect fit.

“I don’t have a ring to give you,” Keith finds himself saying, blinking back his tears. “So I want to tell you that I’ll do the same. I promise to never leave you no matter what and I’ll do everything I can to protect the two of you.” Releasing a small laugh, Keith places his hand on Shiro’s cheek. “You’re my husband,” he whispers with a small smile. “And I love you more than life itself.”

It’s the most he’s ever said in regards to his love for Shiro, usually keeping it to simple _I love yous_ or even expressing it through his kisses, but he doesn’t care. He _loves_ Shiro and this is probably the happiest day of his life.

(He now understands what people meant when they said that.)

“Husband?” Shiro repeats in a dazed tone, leaning into his touch. His eyes fall shut but Keith can still see the tears that start to spill, other hand coming up as he wipes them away. “Hearing you say that makes this a thousand times better.”

“It’s not official until you kiss me,” Keith says teasingly. “I watched a bunch of movies, I know how this goes.”

“You’re so right.”

The kiss is soft and lasts for a long while, full of all the love they both carry for each other, and when Shiro pulls back he can’t help but chase after him for more, feeling the curve of Shiro’s lips as he leans in again and again.

“We can continue this at home, Keith.”

That stops him, the look in Shiro’s eyes sending heat through his body. “Come on, then.” Keith replies, tugging on his hand in an attempt to rush him. There’s no need, though, because Shiro matches his quick pace and they return to their house in no time, tearing each other’s clothes off the moment the door closes.

☆ ☆ ☆

“You made all of this for me?” Keith asks in surprise, staring at the food on the table. It looks better than what they usually eat, presented so beautifully that it makes him smile. There are times when people’s true talents start to shine and this is one of them, Hunk standing across him with a chef apron and beaming in response. “Thank you, really! It all looks good.”

“It’s not a big deal,” Hunk says with a flush, pushing one of the smaller bowls closer to him. “I wanted to help you out and asked Colleen what foods would be good for you and started working with what we have. I know it’s not a lot but you’ll at least get the things you need for your baby.”

This one is full of greens, a hint of a glisten on them that is certainly not water. He gathers up enough on his fork and takes it into his mouth, nose scrunching up when he realizes what it is but then smiling when the sudden flavor hits.

“I used to hate spinach before,” Keith tells Hunk as he stuffs another forkful into his mouth. He waits until he’s swallowed it all to continue speaking, moving his fork around his plate. “Right now it’s really delicious, probably the best thing I ever had.” He grins up at him. “That might be because _you_ prepared it, though.”

Hunk puffs up with pride. “I made my own dressing and added it in, plus it’s mixed with everything else so that’s probably why it tastes good.”

“So, like I said, it’s because you prepared it.”

Hunk only sighs and shakes his head but Keith catches the small smile on his face. He tucks into his food, humming happily at the taste.

Something flutters inside of him.

Keith frowns and ignores it, thinking that it might be his stomach telling him that he’s hungry, and starts to eat some more. Hunk sits across from him and also eats, the two of them falling into a comfortable silence.

It happens again.

He sets his fork down quietly and tries not to draw attention to himself, resting his hand over the spot he felt the movement. Keith doesn’t have to wait too long, feeling another twitch beneath his palm as if responding to his touch.

“Keith? Are you okay?”

He looks up at Hunk, who stares back at him with concern on his face, and blinks in response. “I think,” he starts, licking his lips. “I think I need to go see Colleen? I don’t know if something’s wrong but I want to go anyways just in case.”

Hunk nods once and stands up.

“You don’t have to come with me,” Keith protests when he starts packing up all the food. “I can go by myself!”

“I know you can, but I want to come along so you don’t feel alone.” Hunk says and smiles at him. “I’m your friend, Keith, and I want to make sure you’re okay.”

Keith is almost overwhelmed by that and has to take a moment to himself, turning away so he can blink away his tears before looking back at him with a small smile. “Then let’s go.”

☆ ☆ ☆

Keith feels a bit silly as he says this, sitting across Colleen and tapping his foot nervously. “There are these weird little flutters happening in my stomach, kind of like,” he pauses and thinks it over. “You know the feeling you get around someone you like?”

“Butterflies?”

“Yeah. It feels like that.”

Colleen gains an amused look on her face. “It was very small, right? You might have felt like you could have missed it if it only happened once?”

Keith nods.

“Place your hand on the spot you felt the flutter,” she directs and smiles when he does it. “Let me know when it happens again, okay?”

“Okay,” he echoes, and right after the word leaves his mouth it’s repeated. “There it is!” Keith frowns down at his stomach and rubs the area. “It doesn’t hurt, though, which is weird.”

“I know what it is.”

He looks up.

“There’s nothing wrong with you,” she says as she leans back in her chair. “You’re just feeling your baby moving. This also gives me a rough estimate as to where you are in regards to your pregnancy—twenty weeks, more or less.”

Keith feels frozen, staring at Colleen with wide eyes for several long moments. She only smiles at him as if understanding his surprise and maybe she does, she’s been through this kind of thing before so it would make sense.

Slowly peering down at his stomach again, Keith jumps when he feels another flutter beneath his palm. He releases a small laugh and ignores the way his eyes sting, smiling to himself as he rubs over the spot. “It really is them,” he murmurs to himself. “Wow.”

“Your baby is at the point where they start to hear sound and in a few more weeks they’ll even start to respond to your voice.”

“They can hear me? Will they be able to hear Shiro?”

“Yes to both.”

The laugh that escapes is a lot more watery than expected, vision blurry for some reason. “I’ll be able to feel it more distinctly as time passes, right?” Keith asks her with a small smile. “Feet kicking and hands pushing, I mean.”

“Probably,” Colleen slides a box of tissues close to him and he pulls one out when she’s looking away, still turning his face and wiping at his eyes. “Stretching and rolling too, they just _love_ to be active in there. Hopefully you get some sleep when that starts happening.”

“Oh god,” Keith mutters. “Shiro already keeps me up and now my baby will too? No more sleep for me.”

Colleen laughs.

☆ ☆ ☆

He doesn’t get to tell Shiro yet because he’s told to go out on a week-long run with some of the Marmora members, something he complains about when he’s lying face down on the bed while Keith searches their closet for clothes.

“I wanted to stay here,” Shiro practically whines out, muffled and sad. “Wanted to spend time with you.”

“They need you out there, Shiro,” he replies, pulling out Shiro’s black jacket and tossing it onto the bed. He follows that up with a dark purple shirt, figuring he could wear the jeans he already has on. “You can’t stay back because of me, so get up and get dressed, you’re going.”

Shiro lifts his head and pouts.

Keith raises an eyebrow.

Thirty minutes later, he’s pushing Shiro through the door. He holds a hand up in Lance’s direction to tell him to wait, peering up at Shiro with a smile. “Bring me back something?”

Shiro leans down to kiss him. “I’ll surprise you.”

“Good.” Keith pulls him down for a few more, only letting go when he hears Lance’s loud cough. “Be safe.”

“I will.” One more kiss. “Love you.”

Shiro leaves after that, looking back a few times to wave back at Keith which he happily returns. Keith only goes back inside when the gates close behind him, wondering what he’ll do in his time of solitude.

With each passing day, he ends up feeling secretly glad that Shiro’s gone away. It gives their child the time to develop even more, the fluttering in his stomach seemingly growing stronger and stronger until Keith is able to actually feel the movements beneath his hand.

It’s exhilarating.

When Shiro comes back, right on time, Keith is dozing off on their bed. He’s fully awake by the time the door to their room opens, the sight of him bringing great joy. “Welcome home.”

Shiro responds by collapsing on the bed beside him.

“Long day?” Keith asks with a grin while lightly tugging on Shiro’s hair. Shiro answers with a simple groan and he laughs, gently running his fingers through it instead. “Got everything you need?”

“And more.”

“Find anything good?”

“Got some clothes for you and our little one,” Shiro answers, shifting so his head is closer to his stomach. “You won’t be fashionable but at least you’ll be warm and that’s all that matters to me.”

He feels a sort of tumbling movement this time, far different from the flutters he felt before, and feels his smile grow softer. “What else did you get?” Keith wants to keep the conversation going to see if their baby will respond to Shiro’s voice again. “Anything special?”

“More sunflower seeds.”

“And you didn’t bring them to the room with you?”

“I don’t want sunflower seeds all over the bed! Also, I wanted to spend some time with you.” Shiro moves back up and smiles down at him. “I missed you.”

Keith rolls his eyes. “You were only gone for a week,” he still leans up to kiss him quick, not surprised when he’s pushed back down so it can be deepened. He’s left out of breath when they part and flicks Shiro’s nose when he spots the smug look on his face, brushing his fingers along the scruff he sports. “I missed you too, dork, even though you have this hideous thing.”

Shiro’s smile grows wider and Keith tilts his head back when he starts kissing at his neck, releasing a content sigh as he cups Shiro’s cheeks so he can bring his face up to kiss him. That’s when he remembers his plan, pushing Shiro back and looking at him seriously.

“Before we do anything, I need to show you something.”

He grabs Shiro’s left hand and, ignoring his confused look, places it on his stomach. Nothing is said as they continue to stare at each other, Keith waiting for his reaction and Shiro with a furrow in his brows, and then it happens.

The same movement as before, both strange and wonderful to feel, and Keith watches as shock appears on Shiro’s face. His touch grows a bit firmer, pushing against his stomach lightly like that’ll cause their child to respond, and his expression shifts to wonder when they do.

“Keith!” Shiro says, sounding breathless. “That’s—!”

“Yeah,” he replies with a smile. “I know.”

“How long has this been happening?”

“A while now, mostly all flutters at first but now it’s evolved to what feels like a roll.” The baby responds again and he shifts on the bed, adoration flooding through him at the soft expression Shiro wears as he strokes over the skin reverently. “Colleen says they can hear sound at this point, which means all your chattering will be heard by them.”

Shiro meets his gaze with wide eyes. “They can hear me?”

“Yup,” He pops the _p_ of the word. “A lot of the movements happened because I was talking out loud, and even right now because you were too.”

“Does it feel weird?”

“It does, but,” Keith licks his lips and shrugs, smile turning sheepish. “I kinda like it too? It reminds me that they’re okay in there, safe, and that they’ll remain that way even when they come out because all of us will be here.”

After sliding down to kiss Keith’s stomach, Shiro moves up so he’s hovering over him. There’s a happy tilt to his lips, one that turns into a smile when Keith leans up to kiss him. He tries to keep it slow and sweet but heat starts to build up within him, and he’s soon deepening the kiss, spreading his legs so Shiro can settle between them.

“Want me?” Shiro murmurs, kissing along his jaw. “I want you.”

“Yeah,” Keith breathes out as he tilts his head back, shivering when lips drag along his throat next. “I do, I really do.” He jolts when Shiro bites down on his skin, instinctively rolling his hips against Shiro’s. “Takashi, I need you.”

Nothing more is said as their clothes come off, Keith clutching at his bicep with one hand while the other covers his mouth and Shiro’s metal hand gripping at his hip when he pushes in. They get lost in each other, intoxicating and overwhelming, and don’t bother to leave the bed for the rest of the night.

☆ ☆ ☆

His baby bump becomes a lot more prominent as the weeks pass, his chest and feet also growing in the same time span. When he complained about the latter, Coran returned from a small supply run and handed over two pairs of slippers that made walking around the house ten times easier.

There’s nothing that can be done about his chest, though, so he’s taken to wearing Shiro’s shirts. While the heaviness and discomfort is still there, they’re at least practically hidden because of how big Shiro’s tops are.

Diapers, powder milk, and many other baby supplies start taking up space in their home. The spare bedroom has been cleared out to make room for all the baby furniture, though they do place a bassinet in their own room so the baby can sleep there until they outgrow it. All of it makes Keith feel more excited than usual, a sense of peaceful normality wrapping itself around him that helps him forget how the world really is.

Only sometimes, though.

The baby shower was nothing more than a small dinner like he asked for, prepared by Hunk, with streamers hanging up all around the building. Gifts were given after everyone finished eating and he had gotten one box of diapers and wipes from each person, along with their gift for the baby. They also wrote down the place they got it from, in case they’ll need to get more.

Sam had responded to his questioning look. “Sometimes kids will latch onto a toy or blanket and it’s always better to prepare for it by getting a couple extra when they do. It was harder before because some things were no longer in store but at least you’ll be able to get another _now_ should you need it.”

It all feels a lot more real when the Marmora members stop by for a visit, their stares unnerving when Coran brings Keith with him to greet them.

“I can help you with the delivery,” Ulaz suddenly says after sharing a glance with Kolivan, stepping forward and looking only at Keith. “I’ll even stay here with the rest of you to make sure everything up to the day is perfectly fine, and then some after.”

“Sounds like we should talk about this in private,” Keith comments, nodding to Kolivan and Antok before turning around. “We can do that at Colleen’s office.”

The discussion is actually very short, Ulaz saying that he can go out to the nearest clinic and grab more medical equipment there and Colleen agreeing with him, tacking on that he should bring back one of the beds there.

Keith just nods along to the conversation.

“What about anesthesia?” Coran cuts in. “The delivery is going to be a lot harder without it, doable yes but still difficult—especially since it’s your first time doing this, Keith.”

“I don’t think we’ll be able to get you the kind you need,” Ulaz says apologetically. “It’s not in any local stores or clinics and the nearest hospital is nearly fifty miles out, overrun with too many infected.”

“Then I’ll make do,” Keith shrugs. “Natural births happen all the time, right? I should be good as long as I have all of you around to help.”

With nothing more to discuss, everyone simply sits around while eating the sandwiches Colleen had made. Keith has no more concerns over what will happen in the future, firmly believing that he can do the natural delivery and come out okay.

Still, there is one thing he wants to say.

“Wait,” he says as they start getting up to leave. “I have a request to make.”

Keith has thought this over several times, mostly when Shiro was asleep beside him and he was still awake because their child decided that rolling around was the best thing to do in those moments. Coran leans forward across from him and when Keith meets his gaze he can see the worry residing there.

“If something goes wrong,” Keith starts and holds up a hand when Ulaz starts to speak. “I know you’ve gotten all that we need but let me say this, please?” He waits for them to settle again before continuing, resolute in his decision. “If something goes wrong, then I want you to do all you can to get my baby out of me, which probably means you’ll have to cut me open to do so.”

“That contains a lot of risk,” Ulaz says with a frown. “If we have to resort to that then you may not survive the process.”

“I know,” he replies, hand rubbing over his stomach. Keith has thought of that too. “And I don’t care, I only care about them.”

☆ ☆ ☆

He gets to the point where every movement requires more effort than usual. Keith also feels tired all the time and so off-balance that he also ends up frustrated with how clumsy he’s gotten. Colleen forces him to rest and even tells Shiro that he’s not allowed to do anything besides short walks around the house.

Keith can’t even find a comfortable-enough position to sleep in, which leaves him feeling grumpier than usual in the mornings.

One day he’s too restless to just sit in bed for the rest of it, all alone in the house since Shiro was called out by Sam, so he decides to try his luck and walk around the house and even venturing outside for a bit. This is when Shiro returns, looking ashen.

“What’s wrong?” Keith asks and allows himself to be pulled into an embrace. “Did something happen?

“Matt got bit,” Shiro croaks out, his tense posture remaining even as they continue to hug. “It’s on the leg so I have to go back with the axe and help cut it off.”

Keith pushes him into the house. “What are you waiting for? Go!”

There’s no kiss goodbye when Shiro leaves after retrieving the axe but he doesn’t care, far too worried about their friend and hoping that they manage to get it off in time. He wants to head over there himself but what can he do besides stand in the way? So, he goes back into the house and tries to busy himself with making food.

He’s gotten hungrier now.

Right as he exits the room he ends up dropping his meal when the door is pushed open and an infected shows its face.

Keith definitely can’t move like he used to and there’s no way he can run from the infected either, so he walks backwards into the kitchen and reaches behind him for one of the knives. He presses himself against the counter so his back has some support, eyes unblinking at the doorway as he waits.

A few seconds later it stumbles in, slow at first and speeding up at the sight of Keith. His heart is pounding and he feels his child move restlessly in response. “Come on,” he murmurs with a grin. “Just a little bit closer.”

It trips on something and falls forward.

He manages to sink the knife into its shoulder rather than its head before he moves out of the way, not even bothering to look as its attempts to push itself up. Kicking at one of the decayed claws, Keith makes his way out as fast as he can and heads to the bedroom. He searches through all the drawers and keeps an ear out for the clumsy footsteps, gasping in delight when he finally finds his old pistol, and checks to see if it’s loaded.

Only two bullets left.

Keith exits the bedroom and shuts the door behind him, breathing hard and clutching at the gun with both hands. There’s a pain in his lower back that throbs in time with his racing heart but he pays it no mind—he can deal with it after, when they’re both safe.

The infected steps into view.

He aims and fires, watching it drop to the floor with immense satisfaction. One hand falls to his stomach, rubbing over it soothingly like that’ll help his baby settle down. “Sorry,” he murmurs and starts walking towards the front door, wanting to close it. “It’s okay now, you’re okay.”

Surprisingly enough, it works, and after one last roll they seem to calm down.

After shutting the door he drops down onto the couch in the living room, setting the gun aside so he can continue to rub his palm and fingers across his stomach. The soreness is still there but slowly disappearing because he’s finally resting and he soon finds himself dozing off, the fear from before finally wearing off.

The door opens, forcing him to sit up straight and grab the gun again.

“Keith?”

A smile overtakes his face. “I’m on the couch.” he calls out. “And I’m okay, really. Nothing happened to me.”

Shiro steps into view and the look of relief on his face makes his heart ache. He holds his arms out and Shiro practically falls into them, mindful of his stomach, and he feels the way he trembles just so. Keith rubs a hand across his back and presses a kiss to his head, letting him have this moment.

“I heard the gunshot and I ran over here as fast as I could,” He hears him say. “The gate wasn’t closed properly so a few infected managed to enter but we took care of them before anyone could get hurt.”

So that’s where it came from. “How’s Matt doing?”

“He’ll be okay, maybe. He passed out when we started on his leg.” Shiro leans back, looking tired as hell but still smiling. “I think we stopped it from spreading, though, so he should survive.”

Keith leans forward so he can kiss the scar across his nose, laughing when he sees his nose scrunch up in response. “Do you have to go back?” he asks, grabbing his hand and giving it a squeeze when Shiro nods. “I can come with you, keep you company.”

“That would be nice.”

Shiro helps him up and normally he’d bat his hand away because he can do it himself but this time he doesn’t, knowing the other man needs this. He lets go only to go to their small closet in the hall and grab Keith’s jacket, waiting by his side as Keith pulls it on.

“Ready?”

He’s about to answer when there’s suddenly a small _pop_ within him, unheard but definitely felt. The trickle of liquid that comes out afterwards floods him with embarrassment, thinking that he pissed himself (which wasn’t a problem at all during his pregnancy), but when it doesn’t stop he realizes what is actually happening.

There’s concern in Shiro’s voice. “Keith? What’s wrong?”

Keith looks up at him with wide eyes. “I think my water just broke.”

☆ ☆ ☆

The contractions come moments later, at first similar to the pain he’d been feeling earlier (and that’s when he learns that they probably were the same thing) and then later become a dull ache that leave him feeling uncomfortable as he lies in the provided bed.

Both Colleen and Ulaz had said that he wasn’t fully dilated so, despite the fact that he was so ready to get the baby out of him _now_ and be done with the contractions, he wasn’t able to push just yet.

The discomfort only increases as time passes, the need to get his child out of him growing stronger and becoming a lot more physical. He pushes himself up to sit, glaring up at Shiro who tries to push him back down. “Let me up, Takashi.” he mutters. “I have to push.”

“I don’t know if you’re ready yet,” Shiro says. “Lay back and wait for Ulaz and Colleen, they’ll let you know.”

Keith shakes his head and finally manages to stand up, turning so he can clutch at the railing on the bed. “I can’t wait anymore, it has to happen now.”

There’s silence after that, where Keith can practically feel Shiro’s worry radiating off of him, but he ignores it for now and instead focuses on taking deep breaths. He grits his teeth and ducks his head when he starts trying to push, wildly reaching out with one hand and gripping the one that Shiro offers to him.

The other one starts rubbing his back, a welcome touch while his body is going through so much strain. He’s been told that pushing is supposed to feel like a relief but it only brings forth pain and a sense of wrongness in the general area.

He gasps for breath.

“Keith?”

Shaking his head, Keith tries again. There’s another trickle this time, oozing down his leg and feeling nothing like the liquid from before. He squeezes his eyes shut when the pain gets stronger, a scream leaving his mouth when it becomes too much.

The door bursts open right as it ends and he looks at them blearily. He recognizes them as Ulaz and Colleen but only when he’s laying down on the bed again (how did he get there?) and staring up at their faces.

“Something’s not right,” Colleen is saying, panic and worry in her words. There are hands on his legs, gently spreading them apart and sending more pain through him. Keith digs his nails into his palm and tries to breathe through it, doing his best to stay present. “I don’t think we can wait around for much longer, Keith, so I need to know if you still want to go through with your plan B.”

“Plan B?” Shiro asks, appearing at his side. “What’s plan B?”

Keith doesn’t look at him, keeping his eyes on Colleen and nodding his head. When she leaves he finally looks over at Shiro and it takes a while to focus on him, taking in his panicked expression and only offering a weak smile. “It’ll be okay,” he says in an attempt to reassure him, voice coming out soft and slow. “They’ll be fine.”

“What does that mean?” Shiro whispers and Keith reaches out to grab his hand, holding it in his own and rubbing a thumb across his knuckles. “What are they going to do?”

He turns his head towards the ceiling. “Cut me open,” he answers, gaze flitting around the room to see the other two coming closer with their equipment. “Can’t push and I don’t want to lose the baby.” Keith swallows, not wanting to tell Shiro that he might not survive the process. “You don’t have to stay here, it might be hard to watch.”

“I’m not leaving your side.”

Ulaz speaks up. “Are you ready, Keith?”

Keith nods and then looks over at Shiro again, eyes welling up but no tears spilling out. “I love you, Takashi,” he says quietly, in case it might be the last time he’ll get to say it. “I love you so much.”

If Shiro replies he doesn’t hear it, drowned out by his own scream when they finally cut into him. It hurts, god does it hurt, and Keith clutches Shiro’s hand through the pain. He stops halfway through his second one with a choked gasp, tossing his head back when it increases.

“Keith?” Someone is saying, warm hands touching his clammy skin and tilting his face their way. “Don’t close your eyes, okay? You can survive this, I know you can, so keep fighting.” It’s Shiro, of course it is, and his voice is so shaky. “I’m here, baby, I’m here. I won’t leave.”

He feels something being pulled out of him, something wet splattering across his stomach and thighs, and the sound of a baby crying seconds later. It’s the most beautiful thing he’s ever heard and he feels his own tears start to spill, eyes fluttering shut as he smiles.

“Open your eyes, sweetheart.” Shiro is pleading with him but it sounds so far away. He clings to his voice, to their baby crying, as he’s being pulled into darkness. “Don’t leave me, Keith.” Shiro’s voice breaks. “I need you—we both do—so _please,_ open your eyes!”

“Takashi,” he manages to slur out. “Tak…”

Then, nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :)
> 
> [twitter](https://twitter.com/viribirb) | [tumblr](http://madkingray.tumblr.com/)


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry. This took so long. I was active online and all but I was dealing with other works and school at the same time. I didn't even realize until after finals that school really took up my time and became a priority for me. Please forgive me OTL
> 
> Thank you to everyone who waited patiently for this and thank you to my betas who looked this over to make sure it was okay. I'm so grateful to you all and I'm glad you took the time to give it a look through. I hope you all enjoy this chapter and, uh, there are a couple of TWDG reference in here. I bet you'll spot them easily :).
> 
> Considering how late I am, this can now count as a Christmas gift to the same person. Merry Christmas, I love you.
> 
>  **WARNINGS:** mention of amputation, mention of c-section, attempted suicide (I'm still not sure how to warn this. A character put a gun to their head for one moment. That's it.)

_Someone is humming._

_The tune is slow, almost sad, and there’s a definite pattern in it. A song, perhaps; one that he cannot name but does recognize, and it urges him to move forward. His fingers trail along the wooden walls as he slowly makes his way toward the source, fingers catching on every groove he passes over._

A house, _he thinks as he turns the corner to walk down a hallway, one blurry picture hanging crookedly on the left side._ My house.

_He remembers doing this on days where there was nothing to do, following the paths and feeling all of the flaws within his home. He played little games with himself, and often pretended they were hidden portals holding trapped people that he had to free to save the day._

_It was the imagination of a child, one that was encouraged by his—_

“Dad.”

_His father is sitting out on the porch, large figure easily seen from the living room. He turns and smiles at Keith, tune not faltering, and he feels his heart lurch at the sight._

_Keith pushes the door open and steps outside, taking in the way the sunset paints different shades of orange and pink across the sky. It’s a regular sight outside their home, but it’s one that never gets old._

_“Is that an actual song?” Keith asks when he sits down beside his dad, who wraps an arm around him once Keith leans against his side._

_After clearing his throat, his dad opens his mouth and starts to sing. Keith pays close attention to the lyrics and frowns when it’s over. “That’s a sad song.”_

_“It is. But it’s got a good tune.”_

_“You used to hum it to me before bed.”_

_“Amongst other things.” The arm around him slides away before a hand ruffles his hair. “You always fought hard to stay awake, though. Stubborn little thing.” His dad chuckles._

_Keith laughs with him. “Yeah,” he pauses and then speaks in a quieter tone. “I miss you.”_

_There’s a sad smile on his father’s face when he says, “Miss you too, sweetpea.”_

_“I’m not a pea, dad.” Keith says with an eyeroll, the smile on his face betraying his act of annoyance._

_“You’re as small as one, though.”_

_The pet name brings a fresh wave of sadness but it’s not tainted with the bitterness, anger, and confusion that he got so used to feeling when he was a child. Back then he couldn’t understand_ why _his dad suddenly disappeared from his life, unable to comprehend death as well as abandonment._

_It’s soothing to hear it now, a balm gently applied to the wound on his soul._

_He’s happy that he got to hear it one last time._

_Leaning against his dad again, Keith asks him to hum the song._

_With his arm around Keith, his father does so with a content smile._

☆ ☆ ☆

A warm hand encompasses his own, while another brushes cold over his forehead, and a soft voice speaks only seconds later, “Open your eyes, Keith. We need you. _I_ need you.”

A cry rings through the air, followed by shushing noises, murmurs of words that are too low for him to hear but the crying eventually stops, leaving an ache in his chest.

A scent fills his nose when he breathes in as something gently brushes across his stomach.

The voice making a return, desperation coating every repeat of, “Please, sweetheart, please.”

The soft noises come after another cry, tiny hiccups that slowly fade away.

The smell of lavender and fire, the source seemingly somewhere beside him.

Warmth fills him to the brim, spreading to every part of his body until he feels like himself again. He inhales and feels the way his lungs burn, exhales and feels the way his mind goes dizzy, and a small voice inside of Keith tells him, _“Wake up.”_

☆ ☆ ☆

Awareness comes slowly.

It starts with the feeling of settling back into his body, bringing a heaviness where there was weightlessness. He’s lying down on something, but his mind is too muddled to figure out why. All he can do is lie there and wait until the rest of his senses kick in.

Keith doesn’t know how much time passes before he’s finally able to move.

Opening his eyes is a much more difficult task than it should be, eyelids heavy and lashes feeling like they’re glued together. His vision is blurry and it takes a while to focus on his surroundings, mind catching up only a few seconds later.

He’s in a room.

 _Not mine,_ Keith thinks, staring at an unfamiliar beige walls. _Where am I? How did I get here?_

Is he missing something?

There’s nothing to indicate who lives here, if anyone does, and no one else is in here with him. At least Keith can look around, noting the glass of water on the drawer, the single empty chair that is next to the bed, and the fact that he’s hooked up to an IV.

A door opens to the left of him, dragging his attention to the man that just stepped through.

The sight of him stirs something within Keith, a kind of warmth that makes his breath hitch. It also sends a spark to his brain that ignites it, recognition hitting him hard. He tries to call out Shiro’s name, but all he can accomplish is a grunt, tongue too heavy in his mouth.

That catches Shiro’s attention, and when their eyes lock it’s like the world is complete.

“Keith!” Shiro cries out, rushing to the chair beside him. “You’re awake!”

Keith notices the tired lines in his face and the dark circles beneath his red-rimmed eyes—has he been crying? His hair is unkempt, his scruff looks rougher than normal, and his clothes are rumpled. He looks like a mess but the expression on his face, one of pure happiness, seems to bring some life into him. It gives Keith the strength to curl his fingers around that hand that slips into his own.

“Hi,” he manages to whisper.

Shiro, teary-eyed but smiling, says, “Hey.”

Glancing around again, Keith frowns when he _still_ can’t recognize anything. “Where…” He starts, wanting to get at least one of his questions answered. When he tries to sit up a dull throb in his stomach makes him wince and forces him to stop moving.

“Careful,” Shiro says quietly. “You’re still healing.”

He’s helped up only seconds later, pillows arranged in a way that allows him to lean back against them without discomfort. The throbbing continues, though it’s fainter now, so he lifts his shirt to inspect his abdomen and is met with a line of stitches.

Brows furrowing, Keith’s mind comes up blank when he tries to recall what happened. He looks over at Shiro in hopes of finding an answer.

“It’s okay if you don’t remember right away,” Shiro says. “Ulaz and Colleen said you would be confused.” He lifts Keith’s hand toward his lips and brushes them across his knuckles, voice hushed when he says, “I’m so happy that you’re okay, baby.”

He startles at that, the memory returning quite suddenly and bringing a wave of panic that seems to stab into his very being. Ignoring the flare of pain, he stares at Shiro with wide eyes and exclaims in a hoarse voice, “Baby! Are they…?”

Shiro’s eyes light up as he _beams_ back at Keith. “She’s fine,” he answers, the most sappiest expression appearing on his face. “Perfect, even.”

“Really?” he asks, voice breaking. The relief that courses through Keith leaves him feeling dizzy.

“Yeah,” Shiro lets out a delighted laugh. “All ten toes and all ten fingers. A bit underweight but Colleen says that it’s nothing to worry about. She drinks milk like a champ so it definitely won’t last.”

“She’s okay,” Keith murmurs in relief, blinking away his own tears.

He repeats it in his head, a mantra— _she’s okay, she’s okay, she’s okay, she’s okay_ —and relaxes against the pillows, sniffling and bringing his free hand up to wipe his face. Shiro hasn’t let go of him, a thumb brushing over his knuckles, and Keith focuses on that sensation. It calms him even further, which helps when a new concern arises.

“How long was I out?”

“A few days,” Shiro answers with a definite waver to his voice.  

There’s something to unpack in that statement, the emotion in Shiro’s voice strong enough to make Keith’s insides crumble, but they can do that later when he can think better. He squeezes Shiro’s hand and hopes he understands.

“Can I see her?” Keith asks softly.

Shiro returns the gesture and smiles. “Of course,” he says, planting a kiss on Keith’s forehead before leaving to fulfill Keith’s request.

Keith starts to feel jittery, the prospect of finally seeing the one person he’s been waiting to meet is just within his reach. Will he be able to hold her correctly? Will she even enjoy being in his arms?

He doesn’t even know how to care for a baby. Is it the same as caring for a child? Keith doubts that his newborn daughter has the capacity to enjoy the imaginary games he used to play with his sister or read stories in the tent they pitched up in the living room.

“God,” Keith whispers and rubs a hand down his face. “How the hell am I going to do this?”

“I’ll be here to help you.”

Once again, his attention is dragged to the doorway where Shiro stands. Keith’s gaze rests on the soft smile he wears before dropping to the bundle of blankets in his arms, heart skipping a beat when he realizes who it is.

“Put a pillow on your stomach,” Shiro says and Keith is quick to obey, knowing that Shiro wants it there as a precaution. “I’m gonna place her in your arms slowly, okay?” Shiro continues, edging closer. “She’s still sleeping.”

Keith holds his breath while she’s being transferred to his arms, discovering that she’s not that heavy and actually quite warm. He welcomes Shiro’s guidance and fixes his arms so she can rest comfortably.

All he can do is stare down at her in wonder.

Her cheeks seem very squishy, and she scrunches up her button nose when he lifts a finger to poke one gently. Dark, wispy hair covers the top of her head, soon hidden by a small beanie that Shiro slips on. Small feet kick out once, their baby stretching in place before releasing a tiny noise and settling back down. Keith places a thumb in her tiny palm and she wraps her hand around it tightly, which makes him smile.

Shiro’s hand wipes away the tears he’s been unknowingly shedding and his concerned expression is all he sees when he looks up.

“Are you okay?” Shiro asks.

Keith sniffles and drops his gaze back to their daughter. “I love her,” he chokes out.

It’s different from what he felt for his foster family and what he currently feels for his friends, so much stronger. He already adored their baby while she was still in him, but now that he’s holding her he feels his affection grow. Keith makes a silent promise to himself to do everything he can to make sure she grows up safe, happy, and loved.

He loves her so much.

“Yeah,” Shiro says with a soft laugh. “I understand the feeling.”

A distressed noise suddenly leaves her mouth and Keith gets to watch her eyes flutter open, too dark to know what color they are. They fixate onto him almost instantly and she stares at him as if entranced.

“Hi, baby,” Keith whispers, smiling. “I’m your daddy.”

She makes another sound while her body starts wiggling in his arms. The hold she has on his thumb slackens before suddenly growing tighter, and he allows her to bring it up to her mouth. Keith barely contains his laugh when she starts sucking on his thumb, the sensation new, strange, and ticklish.

“She’s hungry,” Shiro says. “I’ll go fix her a bottle, okay?”

Shiro is the one who feeds her but she’s peering over at Keith while she drinks her milk, gaze following him whenever he shifts on the bed.

Keith is in the same boat. He can’t take his eyes off of her either.

☆ ☆ ☆

Despite being awake and able to walk around on his own, he is forced to stay in that room to rest and recover some more.

Not wanting to risk himself anymore than he already has, Keith readily agrees to this. Shiro seems relieved that he didn’t put up a fight and it only makes him feel guilty, knowing that he must have been in agony while he was sitting there, hoping that Keith would open his eyes.

Their daughter is another reason why Keith doesn’t complain.

Shiro brings her the moment Keith wakes up from his naps, placing her in his arms without being prompted. It makes staying in that bed more bearable because he gets to sit there and stare down at her cute face, holding her or feeding her.

She also has no complaints about the situation. The only time she cried was when Shiro tried to take her from Keith’s arms when Keith was getting tired, and she only settled down when Shiro stopped.

“How come she likes you better?” Shiro had complained with a pout. “I take care of her too!”

“We share a bond, Shiro.” Keith had replied with a teasing smile. “I carried her around for nine months, after all.” He then reached out to tug on Shiro’s hair, which still looks a mess. “She loves you too, okay? I’m sure of it.”

Love is hard to read in the face of a newborn, but Keith is certain that she at least recognizes Keith and Shiro as something important. It’s shown in the way she’ll snuggle in closer to Keith when he’s holding her and in the way she’ll reach out for Shiro, relaxing when she’s grasping one of his fingers.

It’s exhilarating.

After staying in the room for three more days, learning that it’s actually in a makeshift clinic that Colleen hastily secured just for him, Keith finally gets to go home.

“Thank god,” Keith says when Shiro tells him. “I was ready to break down and start begging. I even had an escape plan ready in case you said no.”

“You have to sit in a wheelchair,” Shiro says, completely ignoring what he just said. Jerk. “You can hold the baby in your arms and I’ll push you all the way home.

“I can walk just fine, Shiro.”

“But do you _want_ to?”

Keith thinks about it.

Thankfully, there’s not much to bring with him on the trip home, so he is able to keep a firm grip on their daughter the entire time, who continues to sleep undisturbed. The setting sun means that none of their friends are around the community, and Keith feels a bit sad at the fact, part of him having hoped that they would at least come out and greet him.

Do they not know that he’s awake?

By the time they arrive home, Keith is actually feeling a bit grateful that no one is around. He can finally go to their bed and sleep comfortably.

Shiro takes the baby after locking the wheelchair, allowing Keith to stand up on his own. He holds his arms out to take her back but Shiro shakes his head, placing a hand on the small of his back and guiding him to the front door.

“You’re not supposed to strain yourself,” Shiro chides lightly. “Baby holding counts as strenuous. We’ll just get in and go to sleep, yeah?”

“I can’t wait to sleep in our bed,” Keith comments as they climb the steps slowly. “I know I’ve already gotten enough rest, but nothing beats sleeping at home.”

Keith opens the door and steps into the house, toeing off his shoes and pushing them up against the wall. He walks to the living room and stops when he’s greeted with a banner that hangs from the ceiling, bright red words declaring ‘WELCOME BACK FROM THE DEAD’. All of his friends are standing beneath it, beaming at him.

After the momentary shock wears off, Keith is strangely touched by the gesture despite his weariness. All he can manage is, “Thanks guys.”

He welcomes all their hugs after Shiro herds them to the living room, wincing a bit when Hunk squeezes him with obvious joy. Keith sits with him on the couch while Shiro stands with Allura, Coran, and Lance—falling into a discussion about their supply count, judging by the few snippets of conversation he hears.

“It’s really nice to see you up and about,” Hunk says. “We were all worried for you, and I swear I cried until my eyes felt raw when I heard you were awake.”

“Really?” Keith asks in surprise. No one has ever been _that_ worried for him (except maybe Shiro).

“Yeah,” Hunk smiles at him. “It wouldn’t have been the same without you, Keith. I hope you understand that.”

“I think I’m starting to.”

An itch develops beneath his skin as he repeatedly glances over at Shiro and their daughter. He feels weird over not holding her when he’s done only that for the past few days, so he stands up and walks to Shiro, tapping on his shoulder to take the baby back.

Shiro hands her over happily and once she’s back in his arms he discovers that she’s awake, half-lidded gaze peering up at him. Her nose suddenly scrunches up, eyes growing wet as she starts to squirm in his hold. Keith shushes her quietly when an upset whine leaves her lips and starts to rock her, catching Shiro’s gaze and gesturing to their room with a small jerk of his head.

He nods, understanding, and turns back to his conversation with Allura while Keith heads over to the bedroom. The baby is making more soft, upset noises, on the verge of erupting into tears.

“Don’t cry, baby,” Keith murmurs, pushing the door open with his foot. “Are you hungry? Is that it? I got a bottle for you right here, okay? There’s no reason to cry.”

Shiro prepared one before they left the clinic. Keith sits on the bed and scoots to the side with more pillows, leaning back against them to get comfortable. The baby makes another noise, eyes locked on the bottle, and he huffs out a laugh.

“See? What’d I tell you?” Keith asks, tipping it close to her mouth.

She latches on with a strength that surprises him, distressed noises calming now that she’s being fed. Unfocused, wet eyes observe him intently as the sound of her suckling fills the air. His lips curl up into a smile when her eyes flutter shut, already dozing off even though she just started drinking.

When only half the milk remains, and her rapid paced drinking has slowed down, Keith starts to pull the bottle away. Her eyes fly open the moment it leaves her mouth and she lets out an angry-sounding grunt.

It’s hard to suppress his laugh when it seems like she’s glaring at him.

“Sorry, baby,” he murmurs, leaning down carefully to kiss her forehead. “Don’t be mad at your daddy, I gave you your bottle back.”

Once she’s _officially_ done and burped, he places her in the bassinet that’s nearby and keeps a hold on her tiny hand until she drifts off to sleep. Keith sets a baby monitor up (one that Lance found on a run, still in good shape), placing it on the drawer that is closest to her and taking the other one with him to the living room.

Shiro wraps an arm around him when he sidles up to him and Keith lets the conversation drift by, nodding whenever a friend asks if he’s okay and keeping a tight grip on the baby monitor.

Everyone leaves when it starts getting dark, claiming that they’ll be stopping by in a few days to have a _real_ welcome home party. Hunk adds that he’ll prepare some food for the occasion and, hopefully, bring over fruit that should be picked soon.

“Ready to go to bed?” Shiro asks the moment the door is shut, looking tired but happy. “She’s still asleep so we should take advantage of that.”

The baby monitor crackles to life as a cry comes through. Keith bites his lip so he won’t laugh at the sigh that Shiro lets out and pats his chest like he’s comforting him.

“Thanks for jinxing us,” Keith says. “Now go, it’s your turn.”

“She probably needs to be changed,” Shiro mutters, brightening a second later. “Actually, you should come with me! You’ll learn how to change her by watching me do it, rather than me trying to explain the process. I’ll even guide you through it later.”

“You don’t think I can figure it out by myself?”

“Colleen had to show me like three times before I finally got it right. It’s more difficult than it seems at first, and then it becomes muscle memory.”

And so, they go to their room to deal with their crying daughter.

☆ ☆ ☆

Keith might be losing it already.

Four days have passed since he came home and he’s so exhausted.

He’s still learning how to care for their baby and there have been many ups and downs, the former, sleeping for more than two hours at a time, and the latter, cleaning up messes left and right. It doesn’t help that he’s still supposed to take it easy, so there have been moments when he snaps at Shiro for trying to take more of the load as if Keith is too fragile to do a thing.

It’s overwhelming.

Keith and Shiro work together to try and juggle the new addition to their life. One thing that helps is the feeding schedule they start to establish, giving her milk every three hours or so until she adjusts to it. She starts to get fidgety when it’s time for a feeding, tongue sticking out like she’s searching for a bottle, and they’re usually able to give her one before the crying starts.

She’s a pretty calm baby, which is surprising to Keith since he thought babies were constant screaming machines. She quickly teaches him that she can be on occasion—she _loathes_ baths with a passion, even brief ones, and it takes so long to calm her down afterwards.

Sometimes, when Shiro is changing or feeding her, Keith will lock himself in their empty guest room just so he can catch his breath.

(They still haven’t had the talk they need to have but Keith knows it’ll come up. It looms ahead of them, bringing forth anxiety that churns in Keith’s gut.

He hates that feeling.)

A couple of days later, Allura, Hunk, Lance, and Coran come over in the afternoon, right when they’ve put their daughter down for a nap. She’s been good with napping but is prone to waking up if either Keith or Shiro leave her alone for too long, as if she can sense when they’re no longer in the room.

At least the baby monitor will alert them to her cries.

“We actually found a solar powered battery charger the other day.” Hunk is saying. He slides a plate of casserole in front of Keith and he digs into it eagerly, nearly moaning at the taste. So good. “Which means you don’t have to worry about burning through batteries for the monitors. I’ll get it from Pidge and bring it by when I can; she was trying to see if she could make modifications to it.”

“Where is Pidge, anyway?” Keith asks with a frown. “I haven’t seen her since the day I came home, and she left before I could talk to her. Is she okay?”

Hunk shares a nervous look with Allura while Coran leans forward, eyebrows knit in concern when he asks, “Don’t you remember what happened?”

Keith shakes his head.

Shiro takes the seat next to him with his own plate of food and starts speaking in a quiet voice, “Sam called Matt and me out to check the outside perimeter with him. We don’t exactly know what happened, but one second everything was fine and the next there was just… screaming. None of us were paying attention and Matt got bit because of that mistake.”

“He didn’t…” Keith can’t even finish the question, reaching out to hold Shiro’s hand.

“No, no.” Shiro’s smile is weak. “It was on his calf so we cut it off to prevent the spread of the infection, and so far he’s been fine.”

“I’m certain that the reason Pidge is staying away is because she wants to help Matt adjust to life without a leg.” Allura adds. “Lance and I found some crutches for him on our most recent run and he’s learning how to navigate around with them. I imagine you’ll probably see her soon enough, when she feels like Matt will be okay without her.”

They chat about the community and the runs that they’ve been on recently as they eat. Keith sits there with nothing to offer, content over the fact that he still gets to do this with his friends.

He also wonders if Pidge is actually okay and decides that he’ll drop by her house, whenever he has the chance, to check up on her. Maybe he’ll bring the baby with him so Pidge can meet her, and also to give Shiro a break.

A soft noise comes through the monitor long after they’re done eating. Keith gets up before Shiro can when their baby gets louder, patting his shoulder.

“I’ll go check on her,” Keith tells him. “Maybe she’ll fall back asleep.”

“Can I come with you?” Allura asks, and Keith looks over at her, confused. Her cheeks tinge red and she sounds embarrassed when she says, “I know I saw her the other day but I’d like to see her again. Up close, I suppose. I’ve never really been around babies.”

“I’d like to see her as well,” Hunk chimes in. “Lance does too! He was complaining about how he wanted to see the baby but didn’t want to bug you two!”

“Hey!” Lance swats at Hunk’s arm. “Don’t rat me out!” He looks over at Keith and shrugs. “But it’s true.”

“You guys can come up,” Keith says after receiving a nod from Shiro. “Just be quiet, okay? I don’t want her to get overwhelmed with so many people in one room.”

“I bet she’ll love me!” Coran declares. “I’ll become her favorite uncle the moment our eyes lock!”

“This isn’t Pokémon.” Lance mutters.

Keith can already hear her fussing by the time they reach the bedroom, so he hurries inside and picks her up. Shiro has pulled back the bed covers for him and he smiles in thanks, sitting on the bed and arranging her position until she is lying down comfortably in his arms.

The others edge closer, practically vibrating with contained excitement. She stares at them unblinkingly, intensely, and Keith wonders what’s going on in her little head.

“She’s adorable,” Allura sighs. “You guys did a good job.”

“Thank you?” Keith says, confused. He really doesn’t know what she means by that and figures it’s something he’ll never understand. Might as well express gratitude in response to the compliment.

“We’re really becoming a family now, aren’t we?” Hunk remarks with a happy smile. His eyes are starting to shine, a sign that he’s close to crying. “I mean, I already considered you all my family but now it seems way more real.”

“I’m glad our baby is going to be the bridge between the designations of ‘friends’ and ‘family,’ I really am,” Shiro deadpans, looking down at their daughter. “You hear that, sweetie? You’re the reason why we’ve all become family! Good job!”

She drools in response.

Keith catches Shiro’s gaze and raises an eyebrow. Shiro blinks back at him with mock innocence and the only reason Keith knows that it’s fake is because he can see the quirk to his lips, amusement shining in his eyes.

That expression might kill him someday.

The baby makes a sound that he’s come to associate with hunger and Shiro moves over to one of their counters to prepare a bottle. He glances at the clock they have on top of a drawer, the time confirming that it’s about time for her to have one.

“Sorry, guys,” Keith says, looking at the others. “She’s getting hungry.”

“We don’t want to kick you guys out,” Shiro is saying as he returns to the bed, shaking the bottle in his hand. “But—”

“We’re kicking you guys out,” Keith cuts in with a shrug. He takes the bottle when it’s held out to him and gives it to the baby before she can burst into tears. What a life she lives. “Only out of the room,” he tacks on quickly. “It won’t take long for her to fall back asleep after having milk, so I’ll head to the living room when she does.”

“It’s best if we go back down anyways,” Hunk pipes up. “I brought some fruit and I don’t want it to go bad. Or worse, attract bugs.”

“Oh! Did you bring those sweet apples?” Allura asks him excitedly. “I love those!”

They start to filter out of the room and Keith focuses on his daughter, tilting the bottle up so she can drink more milk.

“All of you can go on ahead,” Lance says suddenly. “I’m gonna stay behind and keep Keith company.”

Keith looks up in surprise, catching Shiro’s raised brow when he stops at the doorway. There’s a hint of concern in his gaze when his eyes flick over to Lance and back.

“It’s just Lance,” Keith says with an eyeroll. “I’ll be fine.” He then asks pleadingly, “Save me some fruit?”

Shiro sighs and shakes his head, but the smile that Keith sees before he leaves tells him that he’ll do it.

Lance awkwardly lingers a few inches away from the door, kicking at the floor with his hands in his pockets. Keith lets out a sigh and scoots over to make room for him to sit, hushing the baby when she whines in protest (spilling some milk in the process, which he quickly wipes off with his sleeve—eugh, that’s gonna stink later).

“Just sit down,” Keith commands when he eyes her cautiously. “She’s not gonna bite.”

“How would _I_ know that? I just met her!”

In spite of his complaint, Lance still sits down beside him and leans in close enough to peer down at her. It’s strangely hilarious to watch the two of them stare at each other unblinkingly, as if caught in their own staring contest, and he snorts when Lance mutters, “Okay, you win,” after blinking.

The baby relaxes even further in his hold, seemingly content with that.

The silence that falls is not at all unpleasant, but there is a certain energy in the air that leaves Keith waiting to hear the reason why Lance wanted to stay behind. Keith opens his mouth when nothing comes forth, only to be cut off by Lance.

“She’s cute,” he comments with a cheeky grin. “Cuter than you, Keith!”

“I actually agree with you for once,” Keith replies. His daughter suddenly flails one of her arms and Keith lets out a laugh when she accidentally smacks her hand against Lance’s face. “I don’t think she does, though.”

“Another Kogane hates me,” Lance bemoans, jokingly upset. “Not even being part Shirogane stops her from hating her tío!”

“Tío?”

“It’s Spanish for—”

“I know what it means, idiot. I’m just… surprised that you’re taking up the mantle so quickly.”

“Well, like Hunk said, we’re becoming more of a family now.” Lance shrugs, cheeks tinged pink. “I know I can be an annoying asshole sometimes, but I feel the same way. You’re like a brother to me, man.”

“Oh,” Keith says quietly. “Back at you.”

Lance smiles at him before continuing, “I used to have family friends that I would call aunt and uncle even if they weren’t related to me, because they were such a huge presence in my life, and I saw them all the time. I thought I could be the same for her.”

“You can be,” Keith tells him. “I want you to be.”

“Really? I didn’t expect you to agree so fast. I had a speech prepared and everything.”

Rolling his eyes, Keith leans back against the pillows and explains simply, “All of you are my family. I know you’ll care for her and love her as if she’s your own.” He tries his best to suppress his grin. “Though I do have one question for you.”

“Shoot.”

“Why did you really stay behind?”

Lance’s eyes go wide and a _nervous_ sounding laugh leaves his mouth. “Can’t I just spend some time with my favorite buddy?”

Keith raises his eyebrows in surprise. This is new. “Your ‘favorite buddy’ is Hunk.” He points out. “You obviously want to talk about something, so go ahead. It’s not like I can do much, I’m literally stuck in this bed because of my daughter.”

It doesn’t take long.

“I know we’re not as close but I trust you,” Lance starts, staring down at his lap. “And I trust that you’ll keep this a secret from everyone. I mean, you’re not like Hunk. I love the guy but he can be such a blabbermouth sometimes.”

“I’m well aware.”

Lance slumps in place. “I’ve been going out of my mind over this,” he says glumly. “It’s been getting harder and harder to deal with and I figured that you might have some advice since you managed to get together with Shiro.”

All Keith can think is: _oh boy._

“Did you see how long it took for us to get together?” Keith asks incredulously.

This new side of Lance is shocking to him, even more so when Lance curls in on himself even further without a retort. He stares at him for a few seconds longer before sighing, casting his gaze to the ceiling and wondering why Lance decided to come to _him_ for love advice.

Keith is still pretty new to it himself.

“Look,” Keith says, staring at him again. He continues when Lance lifts his head, “I was never good at giving advice but I will say this: don’t waste any time. You should confess to this person as soon as you can.”

“What if she doesn’t feel the same way?”

After sneaking a peek at his baby and seeing that she’s deeply asleep, he pulls the bottle out of her mouth and rises slowly with her. Keith walks over to the bassinet and places her in gently, tucking the blankets around her until she’s completely covered and brushing his fingers down her cheek.

“Do you remember when you first came to Lotor’s community? Lotor told me he killed you all.” Keith starts quietly, not looking at him. “I hated myself so much after he did—because I didn’t kill him when I had the chance, because I basically sentenced my friends to death, because I didn’t get the chance to tell Shiro how I felt about him.”

“What does that have to do with this?”

He faces him with narrowed eyes and speaks in a firm voice, “Don’t let those fears hold you back, Lance. You never know what could happen tomorrow, today, or even five minutes from now. I’m glad I got the chance with Shiro, especially after thinking I had lost it. Use the chance you have now. Maybe she likes you back, maybe she doesn’t, but at least you’ll _know_ instead of thinking about all those lost what-ifs.”

“Wow,” Lance says after a while. “Never good at giving advice? I didn’t take you for a liar, Keith.”

Keith scowls. “I hate you.”

A knock on the door catches his attention and he smiles when he spies Shiro standing there, smile growing wider when he see the plate of fruit in his hand.

“You brought me fruit,” Keith says happily, and a tad bit smugly, walking over to take the plate from him. He picks up one of the apple slices and bites into it, delighting in the _crunch_ it makes and the sweet juice that fills his mouth. “Are they all waiting for us?” he asks once he’s swallowed it down.

“Yup. I was sent to bring you back because Coran found a board game in our hallway closet.” Shiro says, and the three of them depart from the room together—Keith grabbing the baby monitor at the very last second. “Have you ever heard of _Clue?_ ”

Keith shakes his head, eating another apple slice.

“The murder mystery game, right? It’s pretty easy to understand once we start playing, but I’ll still show you how to play!” Lance says. He claps a hand onto Keith’s shoulder with a smile, gratitude in his voice when he whispers, “Thanks, Keith. You really helped me out.”

“Anytime,” Keith replies around his mouthful of apple.

They play the game well into the night, sharing pieces of fruit with each other and laughing over the ridiculous suggestions that are made. Keith finds it funny that he used to resent this kind of ‘normal’ when he first met these people and now here he is, enjoying it like the world isn’t a mess.

He actually doesn’t mind.

☆ ☆ ☆

As the days drag on by, the two of them still getting used to parenthood, things begin to grow tense between Keith and Shiro.

It starts off with a few short answers here and there, which could be blamed for the lack of sleep that comes with caring for a baby. Keith only thinks that something might actually be wrong when Shiro stops looking at him whenever they’re having a conversation.

There’s also a space between them that was never there before. It grows and grows until things are just utterly silent and the only time they talk is when they’re discussing their child. Keith’s mind races with possibilities until his stomach is twisting terribly.

The most prominent one is the idea that Shiro is getting ready to leave him.

A stupid thought, of course, but anxiety grips his heart tight and refuses to let go. He fears that there might be some truth in it, that Shiro is distancing himself so he can do exactly that, and Keith starts to do what he does best—pushing Shiro away and burying his feelings so it won’t hurt as much.

(He’s not sure Shiro even notices.)

Despite his best efforts to ignore it, the tension is still suffocating even when they’re not in the same room. Keith decides to get out of the house one day to escape it for a while, taking the baby with him when she wakes up as he’s getting dressed.

He changes her quickly and grabs a gray, hooded one-piece to put on her. It fits a bit loose but it’s fine enough to leave it be, slipping a pair of fuzzy socks onto her feet. She’s not hungry for milk (it is too early for her first feeding anyways), so Keith is able to strap her into the stroller and leave the house after preparing the diaper bag and writing out a note for Shiro, informing him of what he’s done.

With no real destination in mind, and not many places to go to in their community, Keith walks up and down the streets and makes sure to check on his baby from time to time. He does stop, eventually, but he doesn’t go back home just yet.

Keith ends up at the Holts.

“I apologize for not seeing you sooner,” Colleen says after she lets him into the house. Even though she looks weary, her smile is still warm. “We’ve been helping Matt adjust to his new situation.”

“How is he doing?” Keith asks curiously, sitting on the couch and rolling the stroller closer.

“Pretty well, actually! He’s been zipping around on the crutches that Allura and Lance brought in, and the rest of us mostly keep an eye on him in case the infection somehow makes a return. We also make sure that the wound stays clean, can’t risk a different infection happening.” Colleen frowns. “Though I am worried that he hasn’t been taking his painkillers, claiming that he’s okay without them. Is he hiding his pain?”

“Maybe it’s not as bad, or maybe he feels nothing at all.” Keith skims the hem of his shirt with one hand, aware of his slow healing scar. “I know it’s not the same, but sometimes I forget my scar is there because I feel no pain. Unless I move around a lot, I’m good.” He pauses and grimaces, adding, “Also when I sneeze or laugh, which really sucks.”

“I’ve heard about that from one of my friends,” Colleen replies with a soft laugh. “Does that mean you haven’t been taking your painkillers either?”

“I did for the first couple of days, after I came home, but I still felt discomfort in the general area. It also made me really tired and I didn’t want Shiro take care of the baby all on his own.”

Keith feels himself falter when his husband’s name leaves his lips, looking down at his daughter so he can avoid Colleen’s concerned gaze.

“Is Pidge in her room?” he inquires.

“She should be,” Colleen answers. “You go on ahead and talk to her; I’ll stay here and watch after the baby.”

Pidge doesn’t notice when he opens the door, lying on her bed with her gaze directed at the ceiling. She seems to be deep in thought, so he waits for the wrinkle between her brows to smooth out before knocking. She shoots up in bed with a surprised shout, and Keith’s barely-formed grin is quick to disappear when he meets her gaze.

She stares at him with wide eyes, red-rimmed like she’d been crying recently, and Keith can’t help but note how _exhausted_ she looks. His gut twists at the sight, protectiveness rearing its head in him. He opens his mouth to ask how she is, but is cut off before he can get a word out of his mouth.

“Keith…” Pidge breathes out in a tone of disbelief. She rolls off her bed and rushes to him with her arms outstretched, which wrap around him tightly when he meets her in the middle.

Keith can’t help but wince as pain flares up at the embrace. “Ah, Pidge…”

But Pidge doesn’t loosen her hold, growing tenser by the second. Her hands twist in his shirt, to the point where Keith thinks it’ll tear, and the sound of a wet, hitched breath freezes him in place.

“Pidge…?” Keith asks cautiously. “What’s wrong?”

She lifts her head to stare up at him with anguished eyes, and Keith is surprised to see tears spilling down her cheeks.

“Everyone was so afraid that we’d lose you, you know?” She sniffles and chokes out, “Especially _me._ ”

Keith wraps his arms around her, initiating the hug this time, and she falls into it without complaint; sobbing into his shoulder with so much grief and worry that Keith _aches_ just listening to it. All he can do is hold her, hand rubbing up and down her back in an attempt to soothe her.

Eventually the tears die down, leaving behind the occasional hiccup and shaky breaths. Keith lets her go when she makes to pull away, and doesn’t say a word when she wipes at her eyes with her hands.

“I was afraid,” Pidge says quietly. “That I would lose two brothers that day.”

_Oh._

He’s honestly stunned at the admission, unable to think (or breathe) for a moment. It’s much more different than hearing the majority of his friends agree to being a family, because Pidge is someone that he saw as family way before this.

Keith always felt that Pidge was like a little sister to him. He’s glad that she shares the sentiment.

“I’m not going anywhere,” Keith finally says, reaching out to ruffle her hair. “Matt won’t either. I may not know him well, but I have the feeling that he’d do anything to stay with his family, especially you.” He smiles at the frown she wears when he pulls away, tweaking her nose. “Like any big brother would.”

With wet eyes and ruddy cheeks, Pidge beams back at him.

They move over to the bed, sitting at the edge while they talk to each other. Pidge tells Keith about all the stuff that’s been going on with Matt and how she’s in the process of trying to make the house easier to navigate for him, and Keith talks about life with a baby, huffing when Pidge laughs at his complaints about the lack of sleep.

“No regrets, though,” Keith is quick to add. “I love her with all my heart.”

“It’s kinda obvious with the way you talk about her.” Pidge bounces her heel against the bed. “I still haven’t properly met her yet. Sorry about that.”

“Well, you can right now. She’s in the living room with your mom.”

Pidge looks excited and wary. An odd combination. “Do I have to hold her?” she asks. “The last time I met a baby I was forced to hold him for pictures, and then he spit up all over me.”

“Not if you don’t want to,” Keith informs her, and together they leave her room to go into the living room.

Colleen smiles at the them when they enter and nods at the stroller. “She’s awake. Looking for you, I think.”

“Probably,” Keith says. “Or maybe looking for the person who will give her milk,” he adds, looking at his watch. “It’s about time she has a bottle.”

First, he grabs the diaper bag from the stroller’s undercarriage and takes out a container with baby formula, holding that in one hand while he grabs a baby bottle full of water. Keith sets the container down so he can unscrew the top of the bottle to pour some of the formula into it, slipping it back into the bag while he shakes the bottle well enough to mix it properly.

She’s already wiggling around by the time he goes to undo the straps that keep her in the stroller, head turned towards the bottle. Keith _tsks_ softly when she shoves a hand into her mouth and starts gumming on her fingers, sitting down on the couch after he removes her from the stroller.

“Hungry?” Keith asks, despite already knowing the answer. He takes the hand out of her mouth and replaces it with the bottle. She starts drinking it down immediately and her squirming ceases, until the only movement that comes from her is small kicks of her feet.

Pidge leans in closer and says, “She’s kinda cute.”

“She is, yeah,” Keith agrees. He thinks she’s the cutest baby to ever exist, but he might be biased since she’s _his_ baby.

“Does she have a name yet?”

“We haven’t figured one out yet,” he answers with a shrug. “I said before that I wanted to wait because I was hoping to find one that actually fits her, but so far nothing comes to mind.”

“Katie the Second,” Pidge offers with a grin. “I think that’s a good name, don’t you?”

“It sounds pretty decent,” he tells her, laughing when she pouts. “Thanks for the suggestion, but I think I want to figure it out on my own. It’ll come to me soon enough.”

☆ ☆ ☆

Colleen offers to watch over the baby right as he’s getting ready to leave the Holt home after staying long enough for Sam and Matt to meet her (they _adored_ her). He gazes at Colleen with some confusion, not understanding why she did.

“You two deserve a break,” she says. “I know how tough it is and I’m more than happy to help you out.”

“I don’t know…” Keith replies hesitantly. A large part of him wants to reject the offer, not wanting to leave his baby alone for too long, but the rest is encouraging him to take it. Just to be sure, he asks, “Are you okay with it?”

“More than.” Colleen wraps her arms around him and Keith feels his resolve falter as he hugs her back. “Learn to accept help, Keith. You don’t have to do this alone.”

“I’m not, though. I have Shiro with me.”

She pulls back and holds him by the shoulders, eyebrow raised. “Do you?” she asks. “Communication is important when the two of you are caring for a child. If you can’t talk about whatever it is that’s bothering you then it’s just going to make this harder. On you, on him, and on her.”

Although there’s no judgement in her voice, Keith feels a rush of shame and guilt at her words. He’d been ignoring the problem with the hope that it would simply disappear, and that’s not fair on Shiro (or their daughter, since she would have to grow up seeing these issues).

Keith stares into the stroller, where his baby is all wrapped up in blankets as she sleeps on peacefully, and sighs.

☆ ☆ ☆

“I’m home,” Keith calls out as he enters his house, heart sinking when he receives no reply.

His disappointment is short-lived, and he gets a response only seconds later: “I’m in the room,”

Shiro is sitting on their bed, reading a book that he found only months before. He looks up when Keith enters the room and frowns.

“Where’s the baby?” He asks.

“Colleen took her for the day so we could have some time for ourselves,” Keith explains and sits down on the edge of the bed, staring at Shiro. “She told me something that made me realize that we haven’t had our talk yet, and we’ve been having problems with each other. Maybe if we talk things out then we can… move on from this bump in the road.”

Shiro snorts, eyes back on his book. “Bump in the road. That’s a funny way of putting it.”

After closing his eyes and taking a deep breath, exasperated (not for the first time) at this attitude that Shiro has been displaying, Keith quietly says, “Please, Shiro. Let’s talk.”

The silence that follows Keith’s plea stretches on for too long, filling Keith with discomfort. He stares at Shiro while he waits for a response and resists the urge to fiddle with the stray threads that poke out from the bed covers. Shiro’s face is mostly neutral, the furrow in his brow the only tell that he heard Keith.

“You almost died, Keith.”

Keith startles at the sound of Shiro’s voice, watching as he sets his book aside to stare back at him with tired eyes. He looks like how Keith currently feels, but he knows there’s more to it. Has he been thinking about this the entire time? Was he waiting for Keith to take the first step or was he planning to keep it locked up inside until it tore the both of them apart?

Staring down at his lap, Keith doesn’t know what to offer besides, “I’m sorry,” hoping that it’s what Shiro wants. He’s not sure how to continue from there.

“I don’t think you know what you’re apologizing for, Keith.” Shiro leaves the bed and stands a few feet away from him, facing the wall. “You… you didn’t even tell me.”

“Tell you what?” Keith follows after him, reaching out to place a hand on his shoulder, hoping that the gesture will offer some comfort. Nothing else comes from Shiro, other than his body tensing beneath his touch, and Keith feels a spark of irritation. “Shiro, _please._ I’m trying here.”

“How can you keep pretending that everything is okay?” Shiro suddenly asks, whirling around and leaving Keith’s hand hovering in the air. “How can you go back to this ‘normal’ life we live without even thinking about what happened?”

“Shiro, wha—”

“How come you didn’t tell me?” Shiro’s voice contains a hint of desperation. “I had to find out while it was happening, Keith, and it was terrifying.” His eyes are wet as he stares back at Keith, an image that pierces his heart sharply. “Why?” Shiro continues. “Please…”

Keith swallows around the lump in his throat, the guilt so heavy in his chest that it nearly suffocates him. “I didn’t think it would come to that,” he admits. “It was only a backup plan. I didn’t tell you because I knew you’d worry yourself into the ground.”

“Keith,” Shiro says quietly. “I’d rather know about the decisions you make than worry about how I might have to raise our daughter by myself if you died.” He lets out a laugh, sad and bitter. “Did you not trust me enough? Is that it?”

“No!” Keith shakes his head and steps closer to Shiro, trying to do his best to put his thoughts into words that will make sense to him, “It had nothing to do with you, Shiro. I was… thinking of the baby. I didn’t want there to be any chance that I could lose her.” He takes a deep breath and clenches his shaking hands. “I wouldn’t have been able to live with myself if that happened and it’s selfish, I know it is, and it’s even more selfish that I kept it from you but I _knew_ you wouldn’t like the idea. Especially if you knew how I cared so little for my own life.”

“You’re not allowed to think like that,” Shiro sounds (understandably) upset. “Not now, with our baby. She needs you. _I_ need you.”

“I know,” Keith pauses to breathe, taking another step closer to Shiro before continuing. “I need both of you just as much, and after I came so close to dying I realized that I wanted to live more than anything.” They’re only a few inches apart now. Keith’s hands unfurl at his sides. “I’m sorry for hurting you, Shiro. I never meant to cause you any pain.”

“You almost broke our promise,” Shiro whispers.

“I know,” Keith blinks away his own tears, raising a shaky hand and resting the palm against Shiro’s cheek. “I’m sorry.”

Shiro takes a shuddering breath and leans into the touch with his eyes closed. Time drags on by as the two of them linger in this small moment of intimacy. When Shiro speaks his voice is hoarse and broken, telling Keith just how agonizing it must have been for him.

“I thought I was going to lose you.”

Something inside Keith breaks and he brings his other hand up so he can thumb away the slow leaking tears. He continues to do this even when the tears come to a stop, moving on to stroking his cheekbones while Shiro gently grips his wrists.

“I’m right here, Takashi,” Keith says softly, lowering Shiro’s face to plant a kiss on his forehead. “And I don’t plan on going anywhere for a very long time. Not without you, and not without our daughter.”

“You promise?” Shiro asks in a small voice, so vulnerable.

“I promise,” Keith murmurs, and seals it with a kiss.

They end up with their foreheads pressed together, Keith’s arms around Shiro’s neck and Shiro’s hands gripping his hips. He knows that they aren’t okay right now, but he believes that they’ll be on the path to an even better relationship soon enough.

It will just take some time.

“You know,” Keith comments, breaking the silence. “I heard you, both of you, while I was out.”

“I didn’t leave your side.”

Hiding his smile, Keith leans into Shiro’s neck and sniffs dramatically. “I can tell,” he replies and pulls away, breaking into laughter when he catches sight of Shiro’s offended look.

“If you think I smell so bad then I’ll just go,” Shiro says with an indignant huff. “Leave my house and my husband forever since he doesn’t seem to appreciate my musk.”

“Calm down, calm down,” Keith says with a laugh, tugging on Shiro’s arm when he turns toward the door. “I’m joking, Shiro. You smell fine. I’m pretty sure _I’m_ the smelly one since all I’ve done is wipe myself down with a wet towel.”

“We could shower together,” Shiro suggests in a questioning tone.

Keith steps away from him and pushes his sweats down in response, kicking them away and doing the same with his boy shorts. “Sounds like a plan,” he says, gaze locked with Shiro’s as he slowly starts to pull off his shirt. The movement tugs at his incision, but it doesn’t tear the stitches so he ignores the small flicker of pain.

“You’re so beautiful,” Shiro says, and the look of awe on his face makes Keith’s cheeks warm.

After Shiro removes his own clothing, Keith takes his hand and leads them into their bathroom. They decide to indulge a bit by turning the knob to warm and while Shiro is readying some towels for them, Keith opens the shower door and steps inside.

He groans at the feel of water hitting his skin, already feeling cleaner than before. Keith closes his eyes and tilts his head up towards the spray, lips curving up when he hears Shiro enter and move in closer from behind.

A hand grips his hip, thumb rubbing circles over it, and Keith releases a content sigh as he leans back against Shiro’s chest.

“You okay?” Shiro asks.

“Yeah,” Keith answers and turns around, peering up at him with a smile. He cups Shiro’s face and brings it down for a kiss, whispering against his lips, “I’m good.”

☆ ☆ ☆

They stay in bed for a good couple of hours after their shower, exchanging kisses and holding each other—intimacy that makes him feel warm from the inside and out. Shiro can’t seem to stop touching him, a faint smile resting on his face whenever he does.

He only leaves the bed when someone knocks on their door, heading to the living room to open it and smiling when Colleen stands there with the baby stroller in front of her.

She doesn’t even let Keith thank her, waving a hand and saying as she is leaving, “No need to thank me! Just know that you can ask me to babysit anytime! I’ll be happy to do it!”

Guiding the stroller into the house, Keith peeks inside it and sees that his daughter is awake, chewing on her blanket. After checking her diaper to make sure she doesn’t need to be changed, he decides to leave her there for a bit. He takes the diaper bag out of the undercarriage and sets it on the kitchen counter, pulling the used bottles out to wash them thoroughly.

Once he’s done with that he goes back to the stroller and unstraps her from it, smiling when she yawns and rubs at her face.

“Tired?” he asks, holding her close as he slowly walks to his room. “It’s about time for you to take a nap.” Keith starts to rub her back with one hand and she puts her head down on his shoulder, releasing a sigh as she relaxes.

He’s getting better at this.

Shiro’s not in the room when he gets there, but the bathroom door is shut so he guesses that he’s in there. Keith doesn’t bother him, he can put their daughter to sleep on his own.

She starts fussing the moment he tries to place her in the bassinet, already on the verge of tears. Keith is quick to hush her and holds her in his arms again, head in the crook of his elbow this time, but the damage has already been done. Her face starts to scrunch up, upset noises leaving her throat, and Keith does the first thing that comes to mind.

Keith starts humming.

He faintly recalls his father humming the tune from time to time when he was young, one that has been plaguing his head for some time. He walks around the room while rocking her in his arms, amused by the fascinated expression she wears as she gazes up at him.

She drifts off a few minutes later, mouth suckling on air like she has a bottle in her mouth. Keith huffs out a laugh and carefully places her in the bassinet, brushing back her wispy hair as he continues to hum.

“What song is that? I don’t recognize it.”

Jumping, Keith’s rhythm falters when he looks up and notices Shiro standing in the bathroom doorway. He hadn’t even realized that he came out.

“Can’t really remember the name,” Keith tells him.

“Do you know the lyrics at least?”

“They’re kinda sad.”

Arms wrap around him and a kiss is pressed to his shoulder. “I wanna hear you sing,” Shiro requests.

Keith doesn’t even respond, thinking about the lyrics. His mind is snagged on one of the words and it rings out in his head, repeating itself over and over again. When he opens his mouth it’s not a song that comes out, the same word leaving his lips in a whisper instead, “Clementine.”

“Hmm?”

“Clementine,” Keith repeats, and already he can feel the way his heart skips for it. The name settles down in his chest, in the spot where she resides, and soon his heartbeat syncs up with the change— _Shiro, Clementine, Shiro, Clementine, Shiro, Clementine._

He stares down at their daughter and smiles. “Her name is Clementine.”

“Clementine,” Shiro repeats in a quiet voice. He reaches past Keith and glides a human finger down her cheek. “I like it.”

Clementine sighs in her sleep, turning her head and latching onto Shiro’s finger. Her eyes flutter open, unfocused and sleepy, and she makes the smallest noise. It’s not an upset or hungry one, and she seems content with both of her fathers’ focus on her.

“Hi, Clementine,” Keith whispers with wonder. She wiggles in response. “Yeah, that’s you.” He taps her nose and she makes another adorable sound. “You’re our Clementine.”

☆

 

☆

 

☆

“Are you sure you can do this by yourself? I can beg Colleen to watch over Clementine so I can go with you.”

“I know you can,” Keith says with a smile. He grabs the pistol off the kitchen table and checks the magazine, also checking the safety, before shoving it into the holster strapped to his thigh. There are two other weapons on the table and he reaches for the sword without hesitation, strap going over his head and resting across his chest, sword at his back. The knife is the last thing he grabs, slid into the sheath that rests on his lower back.

A small, canvas messenger bag bounces against his hip when he turns, reaching out to poke Shiro’s chest while he says, “But I’m already going to be gone for a while so _you_ need to be there for her, especially right now.”

Shiro doesn’t look happy with the answer but they both know it’s true.

Their daughter was unlucky enough to catch a flu that’s been going around, leading to a day full of sobbing on her end because they had no children’s medicine to help deal with it.

He and Shiro had quietly talked the situation over after Clementine managed to settle down in the night. It was decided that Keith would go out first thing in the morning to try and find some medicine for her, since he’d be fast enough to make it back before the day ends.

A cry comes from the living room and Keith quickly heads over, looking into the playpen that they set up there.

Clementine peers up at him with miserable, wet eyes. She sniffles and holds her arms up, indicating that she wants to be carried, and Shiro steps in to take her.

She’s dressed in a brown one-piece with bears all over it (the hood also has two tiny bear ears as well), unzipped halfway down her chest since she grew uncomfortable with it after he put it on. She grows restless as Shiro holds her, and the flush to her cheeks doesn’t put Keith at ease.

Tears spill from her eyes when she looks over at Keith, leaning towards him while making grabby hands. She blubbers out a stream of, “ _Da, da, da, da, da,_ ” and Keith feels his heart ache.

“I know, baby, I know,” Keith says softly, placing the back of his hand on her forehead. He grimaces at the heat that he feels and smoothes her hair back, wiping her tears away with his other hand. “Daddy is gonna go get medicine, okay? It’ll make you feel better.”

Still sniffling, Clementine rests her head on Shiro’s shoulder as if tired. Keith rubs her back and kisses her forehead, lingering for several seconds before pulling away.

Shiro walks with him to the front door, still holding their daughter in his arms. He’s staring at Keith worriedly and the emotion leaks into his voice when he whispers, “Be careful.”

Keith kisses him and says, “I will.”

He takes the motorcycle out, wanting to get into town as fast as possible and leave just as quickly. It’s a red and black one, found and brought in by Shiro. Keith fixed it up himself before anyone else could get their hands on it, and now he uses it whenever he has to make quick runs, weaving between infected that shuffle across the streets.

This time he needs to be extra careful since Lance said that there’s been more infected trickling into that same town. Keith doesn’t want to alert them all to one place by driving his motorcycle in, so he parks it between some trees that are on the path to town and covers it up with enough bushes to keep it hidden.

The walk into town is actually pretty quiet and he only runs into a few infected here and there, which he quickly dispatches with a swing of his sword. Keith could have used his knife, sure, but he wants to get even better at using the weapon—practice makes perfect, after all.

It’s also really fun to use.

Keith goes into the stores first, killing off any infected that are stuck in there before searching through all the shelves. Frustration prevails him when he continuously comes up with nothing, only empty boxes of what he needs. He does eventually find two small water bottles, hidden in an emptied out cabinet and wrapped up in a plain black t-shirt, and he stuffs it into his bag with the thought of Clementine drinking it after her medicine.

Slightly despondent, Keith leans against one of the store buildings and tries to think. Looking through the nearby houses would be pointless since they all searched through them a while back, but maybe he could double-check—just in case.

Then he remembers that there is _one_ place he hasn’t checked.

It’s a mall that stands tall in the center of the town, with clothing stores and restaurants scattered on the outskirts of it. The only problem is that he doesn’t know how many infected are in there since no one has attempted to get in; even the ones in the Marmora community don’t dare risk their own to seek that knowledge, and have cautioned them against going in.

They all listened, trusting their warnings of danger and even hearing the hisses and groans of the undead when they searched through the stores on the outside.

But Keith is desperate right now.

He enters through one of the clothing stores and slowly navigates his way through the store, picking off any infected that block his path by slicing their heads off with his sword and jamming the point into their skulls.

A gate closes this store off from the rest of the mall and it’s lifted up high enough to allow someone to crawl beneath it. He peers out the display window right next to it to make sure it’s clear on the outside and drops to the floor, inching his way beneath the gate and getting up once he’s inside the mall.

Tightening his grip on his sword, Keith takes a deep breath and ventures in deeper.

Some of the infected that he encounters are dragging themselves across the floor, missing one or both legs. Bullets are scattered across the floor, and when he spies three army vans blocking the front entrance from the outside he figures that they probably came in early and tried to clear out the problem, not knowing how to actually do it.

“Idiots,” Keith mutters, taking note of which side of the mall the vehicles are parked at. There might still be weapons there and that’s always something of use for the community.

The different sections of the building either have flickering lights, dim ones, or natural light pouring in from the glass ceilings. Some infected are attracted to the flickering sections, bumbling around in circles. He picks them off as he walks through, stopping at a snack kiosk when all the bodies are on the floor to clean off his sword.

He doesn’t want a buildup of blood and brain matter on his blade; it makes it harder to kill other infected because it’ll get stuck on their bodies.

(It’s something he had to learn the hard way.)

Walking through a broken-down store to get past a block in his path, a few different kiosks that were placed in a horizontal line, Keith finally finds what he’s looking for when he exits.

Tucked away in a corner, next to a shoe store, is a pharmacy.

Keith feels his entire being light up at the sight of it, victorious at finally finding something that might have what he needs, only to wilt a moment later when he notices the electronic store across it.

Static is playing on the TV monitors inside, and it’s loud enough to be heard throughout this entire section of the mall. A group of infected have been drawn to it, too many to kill off, and Keith wonders how the hell he’s going to get to the pharmacy without being spotted.

“Don’t be a coward,” Keith whispers to himself, crouched down behind a jewelry display case. “You have to risk it for her.”

He takes a deep breath and slowly makes his way over to the shop, keeping an eye on the infected the entire time. They pay him no mind and he makes it there without any trouble, silently breathing out in relief.

The pharmacy doors are covered up by a security gate but there’s plenty of space between them. Not enough for him to slip through and try to open the doors, though, since the diamond shaped holes in the gate are much too small for him to try.

He actually doesn’t have to worry about figuring out a way to get inside.

One of the display windows is broken and he carefully slips through it, going slow so he won’t disturb any of the extra glass. Keith makes it inside without making any noise, searching through all the shelves for children’s medicine after finding the pharmacy empty of infected.

“Yes!” Keith whispers excitedly when he finds a few boxes, doing a small fist pump as he props his sword against the wall to read the drug facts.

The dim lighting of the pharmacy makes it harder for him to see the words, so he has to squint to try and make sense of it. So focused on this, he doesn’t notice that he has company until he hears a growl right in his ear.

Keith barely has time to jump away from the lone infected’s teeth, cursing loudly when he knocks his sword over. Not wanting to risk himself by diving to the floor for it, Keith pulls out his knife and and grips it tightly, waiting for it to stumble closer before lunging forward and sinking the blade into its skull.

They both fall to the floor, causing bottles of pills to scatter all over the place. He tugs the knife out, wipes it off on the body’s sweater, slides it back into its sheath, and rushes to gather up the medicine. Keith shoves them into his bag and takes a few seconds to make sure that it’s covered up by the shirt, snatching up his sword and hurrying to the window.

Another infected snarls in his face and he suppresses his shout as he kicks it away. Horror fills his body when he sees that half of the group is standing before him, reaching through the glass, and the other half is shuffling their way over to join them.

He jumps to the side when a few rotting hands swipe at him and slips on a flat piece of glass, falling through the side of the window display and grunting when he lands on the floor harshly.

Picking himself up, Keith can feel his stomach sinking when he realizes the situation he’s in.

Too many infected block both of his exits, and he thinks that he sees more trickling in from other stores, drawn to the noise that’s being made as they rattle the bars of the security gate. Gnarled fingers reach through the holes and try to grab at him, rotting jaws snapping and wet groans filling the air. With how trapped he currently is, Keith doesn’t see a way out of this.

He’s going to die here.

The hold he has on his sword goes slack as he sinks to the floor, burying his face in his knees. Giving up is never his forte but Keith can already feel the dread settling in his stomach, acceptance starting to flow in.

His head is still racing with panic, making it hard to think, so Keith tips his head back and tries not to focus on the sounds of the infected. Their inhuman sounds slowly fade away, white noise to him as he stares at their disgusting faces.

 _This is it,_ Keith thinks. _This is really it for me._

Only one thing left to do.

Keith grabs the pistol with his free hand and points it at his head.

Shiro’s worried eyes come to mind, his happy smile, and his loving kisses. Clementine’s sad eyes appear only a second after, her delighted giggles, and her sloppy attempts at kisses when she’s imitating Shiro. He lowers the gun after this all flashes in his mind, feeling calm enough to finally think clearly.

_“We won’t ever leave each other, okay?”_

_“Okay.”_

Shoving the gun back into its holster, Keith rises up slowly and grips his sword tightly. He stares at the infected as they start get frenzied, pushing at the gate with hunger in their wild eyes.

He’s _not_ going to die here.

He’s not going to die, period.

☆ ☆ ☆

The gates open up without him having to say a thing, probably alerted by the engine of his motorcycle. Keith gets off to walk it in, ignoring the obvious staring that comes from both Lance and Coran.

“What happened to you?”

“Killed a bunch of infected,” he states, continuing down the street without glancing back. “Have a nice day.”

There will be questions and concerns later on, people dropping by his doorstep once word gets around that he came in looking like someone straight out of an old horror movie, but he doesn’t give a damn right now. He has more important matters to attend to: getting the medicine to his daughter and seeing Shiro.

Leaving the motorcycle in his driveway, Keith steps into this house and breathes in the comforting scent of home. The sound of footsteps occur the moment he shuts the door, which come to a stop when they reach him, followed by a surprised exclamation.

“Keith!?”

“Honey, I’m home.” Keith says tiredly, one hand against the wall as he unzips his boots and toes them off. He pushes himself off so he won’t dirty up their home, offering a weak smile in response to Shiro’s alarmed expression.

“Is that _your_ blood?”

“No,” he answers shortly, pulling the messenger bag off his shoulder, then the sword, and shrugging off his jacket. Keith lets the last two fall to the floor before digging through the bag.

“Are you okay? Did you get bit?” A hand grabs his arm. “Come on, Keith. Talk to me.”

Keith doesn’t respond, focus single-minded as he carefully unwraps the boxes of medicine and bottles of water he brought with him. Happy to see them in good condition, he shoves the shirt bundle into Shiro’s hands.

“Give her the medicine,” he orders, taking off the rest of his clothes and leaving it in a pile beside his boots. They’re all going to need a harsh scrubbing later. “I’d do it myself, but I don’t want to get near her when I have blood all over me.”

Shiro arches a brow.

“I’m _fine,_ Shiro. No bites and no scratches.” Keith walks past him and heads into the bathroom. “I need to shower, okay? I’ll be out in a few.”

“Maybe longer,” Shiro calls out before he shuts the door. “You stink, Kogane.”

“Shirogane!” Keith corrects. “We’re married, remember?”

Standing beneath the warm spray, Keith watches the blood wash off of him and go down the drain. The reddish-brown water turns pink, then the pink turns clear. That’s when Keith grabs the small towel that hangs off the top rail, scrubbing at his skin with it. He combs fingers through his hair afterwards, making sure that nothing is hidden between strands of hair before washing it with shampoo, then conditioner.

He shuts off the water not too long after that, checking over himself for any remnants of soap suds and then stepping out.

A pile of clothes rest on top of the toilet lid, a towel accompanying it. Keith picks up the towel first and dries himself off, patting his hair with it so he won’t tangle it up like he did last time. Shiro made fun of him for it and only relented when Keith playfully ignored him.

Finally dressed in his own sweats, his own shirt, and one of Shiro’s pullover hoodies, Keith exits the bathroom and quietly makes his way to the living room.

Shiro is tying up a bag by the front door, yellow rubber gloves on his hands. He lifts his head when Keith arrives, like he can sense him, and smiles at him as he yanks the gloves off and leaves them on the bag.

“Hey,” Shiro says.

“Hi,” Keith replies.

He stands still as Shiro strides over to him, cups his face, and kisses him deeply. His hands drop to Shiro’s waist to pull him closer, closing his eyes and humming into it. Shiro presses his forehead to Keith’s when they part and they just breathe together; remaining suspended in this moment, uncaring of how much time passes.

“You wanna talk about it?” Shiro asks quietly, breaking the silence.

“Not really,” Keith admits. “Maybe later.” He wraps his arms around Shiro, tucking his face into his neck. “I’d rather take a nap with you right now.”

Shiro hums. “Sounds like a plan.”

☆ ☆ ☆

Later in the night, when they’re both well-rested, Keith sits on the bed with Shiro and talks about what happened. He rests his head on Shiro’s shoulder and plays with his fingers while he speaks, welcoming the hug that he’s brought into when he’s done.

They stay pressed up against each other until soft sounds come from the crib that’s pushed up against the wall, tiny hands gripping the bars of it. Keith sits up a bit and waves at their daughter when he sees that she’s peeking through, laughing at the smile he gets in return—two tiny bottom teeth shown off with the action.

“You feeling better now?” Keith asks, letting go of Shiro’s hand to walk over and get her. She grabs ahold of his hair the moment he lifts her up and he tries not to flinch. “I guess you are.”

“It might be time for some more medicine,” Shiro says thoughtfully. “We should give her something to eat first. I’ll go mash up some apples.”

Clementine eats it all happily and takes the medicine without complaint, Keith even has to hold her away when she leans forward as if asking for more. She stays on the bed with them, lying down in-between them and tries to grab at the hand he’s holding above her.

He almost didn’t make it back to her or Shiro.

“I don’t think any of my fear has left me.” Keith says in a whisper. “But it’s not for me anymore, no. It’s all for her. What will happen to her if we…” He can’t even finish the thought.

A hand encompasses his thigh and gives it a squeeze. Keith looks up, meeting Shiro’s gaze and feeling a bit reassured by the smile he sees on his face.

“We’ll get through this,” Shiro says.

 _We’ll survive._ Keith hears.

Clementine finally curls her hand around his fingers and brings them to her mouth to bite. She does so without a care in the world, covering the digits in drool. Keith fixes her messy bed head, tapping her nose just so he can see it scrunch up.

He hopes she’ll never have to learn how life really is outside their walls.

“We will,” Keith agrees, and some of that fear melts away.

_We’ll keep going for her and for each other._

It doesn’t take long for Clementine to fall back asleep, the flu making her more tired than usual. Her forehead is still warm but at least it’s not as much as before, and her breathing sounds clearer so Keith takes that as another sign that the medicine is working. He covers her with their blanket and brushes his fingers down her cheek.

“I’ve always wanted a family,” Keith confesses. It was a desire that dwelled in the recesses of his mind, wanting to start one of his own after spending so much of his life alone—being adopted did not extinguish it.

He never talked about it since he didn’t want to be seen as less.

That no longer matters now.

“Me too.” Shiro replies in a quiet voice. “Never thought I’d have the chance, considering…” He lifts up his bionic hand and gives it a shake, gesturing to his face afterwards. “But then you came along and gave me everything I wanted, and more. You made this life worth living by giving me a family.”

“I’m glad I found you,” Keith says, looking over at Shiro with a soft smile. “I’m glad you’re still here. I’m glad you’re a part of this family.”

“There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.” Shiro says. He leans down to kiss Clementine’s forehead and then leans over to kiss Keith.

Love swells up within him, warm and everlasting, and Keith doesn’t have to cling to the feeling like he normally would. They can live in this community for the rest of their lives and keep their daughter safe from the dangers of this world, and he has the family he has always craved.

Keith kisses Shiro and tastes their forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! Thanks for reading <3! If you want to see more of my content you can usually find me here.
> 
> [Twitter](https://twitter.com/viribirb) | [Tumblr](http://madkingray.tumblr.com/)
> 
> (Also I know it took them long to name the baby. It's not mentioned at all but... considering the world that they live in, maybe they just wanted to wait and see if she would live. But this was always the name she would have when I first started this AU with my friend haha. And YEAH. The song Keith dad hums/sings is probably obvious. It's a short, simple, saddish song but... the tune was nice.)


End file.
